If you struggle to muster up ANY enthusiasm for Kylie Jenner’s lip kits and think you’re more likely to find a highlighter in a pencil case than a makeup bag, you’re not alone.
While the rest of the world pry open palettes and have conniptions over contour techniques, the less interested among us remove the rubbery gunge from our pharmacy-bought foundation and power on.
And while it might seem like no big deal, it’s actually incredibly confusing to hear friends and family members gush over items that you don’t even know how to use.
Here are just ten things any girl with zero interest and zero skills in makeup department will know to be true.
1. You need a degree from NCAD to perfect the contoured look.
"Is the brown stripe meant to go here or here? And where will I put the cream stripe?"
2. You think hysteria over Kylie Jenner's lip kits is the end of humanity as you know it.
"You're joking right now, right?… Are you crying over lipgloss?"
3. Primer is nothing but a swizz and you won't be falling for it any time soon.
"€30? Thanks, but I'll be slapping on my €3 moisturiser as usual."
4. You replace makeup as it runs out, and not because a reality show star has released a new line.
"But don't you already have 13 of her glosses?"
5. You don't think you have enough face for the amount of products you've been advised to wear.
"My face will literally enter the room five minutes before I do if I add another layer, lads."
6. You thought you had cracked it when you splashed out on an eyebrow gel.
"Ladies, it's like mascara but for your BROWS."
7. Your makeup routine takes you 15 minutes and that's when you've used every single item in your makeup bag,
"I swear to God, I tried. I looked up a tutorial and everything."
8. You're not loyal to any brand, and you generally snap up a mascara if it's on special offer.
"Plastic wand? What would I care?"
9. Bristles stick to your face because you haven't splashed out on new brushes since your Debs.
"Yeah girls, cos I'm gonna spend €40 on a bloody brush?!"
10. You secretly wish you could get excited, and sometimes wonder if you're missing the cosmetic gene.
"Oh my God, have you guys seen the new palette by… oh, forget it. I can't fool yee."
The close-up picture showed off her natural beauty and a sprinkling of freckles.
She captioned it, ''This year my resolution is to love myself…just as I am, all fucked up and imperfect and whatever else. And to let my freckles liiiiiiiive.''
Her 2.9 million followers applauded her for embracing her imperfections.
It will be Chicago's first and only birthday as the youngest baby in her family as Kim confirmed that she and Kanye are expecting a baby boy via surrogate this year.
The couple are parents to three kids – five-year-old North, three-year-old Saint and one-year-old Chicago.
We hope baby Chi has an amazing day – we're sure she will be spoiled by all the fam.
Gillette has made more than a few mortal, and almost exclusively male, enemies today after it debuted its brand new advert about toxic masculinity.
The ad is currently trending on Twitter, having clocked up three million views already on YouTube as well as 282,000 dislikes.
The two-minute clip opens up by showing men of varying ages and ethnicities staring into the mirror, before the narrator asking the question: 'Is this the best a man can get?', turning its former brand mantra on its head.
As the ad rolls on, it shows both negative and positive sides of supposedly 'masculine' behaviour, from bullying and harassment, sexual misconduct, 'mansplaining' and violence, to men standing up for sexual violence victims and acting as excellent father figures.
The video faces the Me Too movement head on as a brand which has a predominantly male audience, and regularly aimed its former ad campaigns at gruff, typically 'masculine' men.
Many viewers felt that the advert accepted its vital responsibility in speaking to their target audience, considering men have been notoriously at the heart of sexual assault allegations.
One especially poignant part of the clip shows Terry Crews speaking out about sexual assault, crucially standing up for both male and female survivors and their Bill of Rights.
WATCH – @terrycrews full opening statement: "I am honored to use my platform and story to help create additional civil rights protections for survivors across the nation under the Sexual Assault #SurvivorsBillofRights."
On the one hand, Gillette's message slightly missed the mark by tarring an entire gender with mostly the same brush, though it did show varying 'types' of men. Some say the advert is capitalising on the #MeToo Movement, others say it's complete chastisement.
The reception has been extremely mixed, with some of the target audience (all men) wanting to go as far as boycotting the brand forever, and others praising it immensely.
One infamously vocal *cough* vile *cough* public figure to comment on it is, of course, Piers Morgan.
I've used @Gillette razors my entire adult life but this absurd virtue-signalling PC guff may drive me away to a company less eager to fuel the current pathetic global assault on masculinity.
Let boys be damn boys.
Let men be damn men. https://t.co/Hm66OD5lA4
The deplorable King of 'Boys will be boys' rhetoric himself has been arguing with members of the public ALL THE LIVELONG DAY on Twitter, claiming man-hating 'feminazis' are waging a war against men through advertising. As if advertising in essence isn't inherently waging a war against women. But whatever.
(Let it be clear: Anyone who equates feminism with man-hating has absolutely zero notion of what feminism means. Feminists hate the patriarchy, not men themselves. They are two different things. Thus ends the public announcement services for today)
Gillette: Men, could you please be the best versions of yourselves and care for yourself and others
Why has the advert received such an angry response?
Many viewers believe that Gillette's efforts have created a video full of preaching, which isn't totally untrue. The video may have missed the mark with it's tone, after all, women know all about what condescension feels like.
We experience patronising behaviour on a daily basis in the workplace, among other settings. It never teaches us the lesson it's attempting to, which for me is the main problem with the ad.
I mean, the clip showing a line of men, standing behind BBQs with smoke wafting up from their grills, reciting “boys will be boys will be boys will be boys"? It's a bit obvious.
That being said, the ad didn't even show the worst aspects of the patriarchy, the worst of the predators, the horrors many women face every single day. It didn't even go that far when we think about it from this perspective, but yet thousands are saying it went more than far enough.
However, the ruthlessly aggressive response by some users to the video clip, in one way, reiterates the point.
While I don't believe all men (or women) should be tarred with the same brush, I do believe that the defensive backlash shows the toxicity of the defensive feminist-fearing aggressive male dialogue.
Today, all the men in Britain who insist that everyone else is snowflakey, over-sensitive and thin-skinned will be crying about an advert that is not scheduled to appear on British TV. Just a heads up. #Gillette
Like many women and men have said, only those who have done something wrong should be afraid of the Me Too era.
By becoming an ally for sexual assault survivors, by proving you believe in equality, by acknowledging the pain which survivors of sexist behaviour and sexual violence have undergone, by lifting up women and minorities such as the LGBT+ and trans communities; only then will society believe that you aren't part of the problem.
It's time for a lot of men to stand up and prove themselves; just because you haven't done anything wrong in the past doesn't mean that you can't stand up for what's right when it matters. And in today's Me Too society, it really matters.
Seeing a massively popular brand attempt to start a conversation is encouraging for most of us, despite the fact that the ad was overdone and the tone was slightly missed.
The male demographic clearly felt attacked by the ad (um, hello, EVERY MEDIA ADVERT makes women feel like sh*t about ourselves so now you understand how it feels) despite the fact that it was arguably trying to encourage them to better themselves for their own benefit.
Let's not forget that toxic masculinity is harmful to men as well as women. While men are the perpetrators of 90% of violent crime in America, they are also 70% of the victims of violent crime. They are also four times more likely to commit suicide.
By facing the aggression and violence inherent in society, men find gain too, yet so many of them are too angered by the ad to see that it isn't trying to attack them personally.
Hate speech by Gillete. Manly Alpha males rule. Pansy betas are actually misandrists and thats who this ad is supporting. #BoycottGillette
President of Procter & Gamble, owners of Gillette, stated that;
"By holding each other accountable, eliminating excuses for bad behaviour, and supporting a new generation working towards their personal 'best,' we can help create positive change that will matter for years to come."
No doubt Gillette anticipated a backlash to the clip, but all publicity is good publicity as the saying goes.
Gillette better be careful or it’ll suffer the same financial fate Nike did when it made rightwingers mad. pic.twitter.com/8ELvdwVDgF
Gillette has collaborated with the Building A Better Man project, which aims to reduce violent behaviour in men, and The Boys and Girls Club of America, which helps young men develop better communication skills.
The company is also donating $1m a year to US charities who work to support men over the next three years.
It has to be said that their efforts deserve praise, since #MeToo began there has been a shocking amount of defensive commentary from groups of men as opposed to constructive conversations and support for women and minorities suffering at the hands of the patriarchy.
Gillette has rarely found itself in the midst of controversy, but today everyone is talking about them.
Whether you're avoiding sweet treating, ditching the booze or trying your hand at Veganuary, well done you if the integrity of your New Year's Resolution has remained intact.
However, we regret to inform you that tomorrow is the day that most people fall of the wagon.
According to Deliveroo, on Wednesday they are set to see a significant jump in orders of alcohol and sweet treats – hardly a coincidence?
17 days without gin and tonics or refined sugars is enough of a detox for us, thanks.
The exact time people give into temptation is in the magic half hour marker of 18.34pm.
When it comes to booze, Deliveroo saw a spike of 67% in prosecco, wine and beer orders during December but demand plummeted by 49% from January 1st, with many deciding to take part in Dry January.
Though it seems that two weeks, one day, eighteen hours and thirty four minutes is enough for Irish January teetotalers.
Veganuary is particularly popular this year, and those who partake seem to have more willpower than their alcohol or sugar abstaining resolutioners.
On average, Irish participants of the plant-based effort last the entire month.
Deliveroo reports a whopping 203% increase in the number of vegan dishes ordered on Deliveroo in comparison with January 2018.
However, last February there was an increase of 53% in burger orders as many went back to their omnivore diet. Deliveroo predicts another increase this February 1st, when Veganuary ends.
Whether you're ready to throw in the towel right now or have disbanded your resolution days ago, we have to say that one evening of indulgence won't ruin the entire diet and exercise plan you have going on.
However, if you manage to soldier on through the day of retracted resolutions with your's intact, then fair play.
We know what we'll be choosing… *opens Deliveroo app*
Aziz Ansari is bringing his Road to Nowhere tour to Dublin this year, it has been announced.
The Emmy Award winner will perform in Vicar Street on March 31.
The Master of None and Parks & Recreation star is touring for the first time when his career was stalled last January following allegations of sexual misconduct.
It might have to do with Britney cancelling her Britney: Domination Las Vegas show after her dad Jamie suffered a colon rupture – maybe the scare looks like it might have made Britney think about how important family is.
According to Hollywoodlife. “Britney would really love to have more children, and she has expressed very much wanting to do that sooner rather than later.''
They continued, ''She’s so happy with boyfriend Sam and would love to have a baby with him. Her father’s health really made her take a step back and figure out what’s important.”
There might also be another reason why she would like another kid.
Reportedly Britney is, ''Taking some time to figure out what she wants out of life, and right now it seems like she just has no desire to perform and all her focus is on her family, including adding to her own. Britney absolutely loves her fans and performing, but she also loves being a mom and knows she’s getting older.''
If she decided to, we wish her all the best- she'll always be our fave pop star anyway.
With the current charged political climate of #MeToo, which is bringing issues of consent, sexual violence, abuse and harassment to light on a daily basis, it's the PERFECT time for a show like Sex Education.
Netflix' new series is already critically acclaimed with it's standout teenage characters, incredible acting talents and refreshing humour, but what's just as important is the need to face sexuality and it's trials and tribulations at a young age.
The show is tackling imperative issues and somehow manages to be laugh-out-loud funny at the same time, how does it achieve this unique, charming quality?
Sex Education follows Otis Milburn, a socially awkward but sweet-natured sixteen-year-old (Asa Butterfield) and his sex therapist mother, played by the amazing Gillian Anderson.
Otis' school life is filled with iconic characters like Eric Effiong (Ncuti Gatwa), the most GAS LGBT+ character of all time, and misunderstood punk and resident badass Maeve Wiley (Emma Mackey).
Middle finger Maeve= our 2019 mood. You heard it here first:
After discovering his penchant for giving responsible and understanding sex advice, Maeve 'complex female characters' Wiley encourages Otis to set up his own teen sex clinic for some quick cash, and the results are HILARIOUS.
Among the vital topics faced with beautiful skill are abortion, transphobia, homophobia, mental health, consent, contaception, racism, sexism and toxic masculinity; we're in awe of episode three and the emotional rollercoaster of teenage life, told with humour and care.
Here are the best memes and reactions online to our new favourite binge-worthy show, PRAY FOR SEASON TWO IMMEDIATELY.
1. How pure Eric and Otis' friendship is:
Otis and Eric’s friendship on Sex Education is such a wonderful, healthy, and pure example of male friendships. There is no weird toxic masculinity bullshit or homophobia. Just pure love. pic.twitter.com/PKR3xrF8Ki
Wow #SexEducation really gave us the most layered and complex characterization of a gay teen of color!! He wasn’t there for comedy relief or for tokenism. He had his own storyline and grew into this BEAUTIFUL, FIERCE, and joy-spreading angel
We live in a world where implants and fillers and Botox can be seen as the norm, especially in the celeb world.
So it was a surprise when Yolanda Hadid took to Instagram to say that, at 55-years-old, her figure is natural.
The former star of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and mum to models Gigi and Bella and Anwar posted a sizzling snap of herself clad in pink underwear.
She captioned it, ''Fifty Five and smiling from the inside out….Finally back to the original 1964. Living in a body free of breast implants, fillers, botox, extensions and all the bullshit I thought I needed in order to keep up with what society conditioned me to believe what a sexy woman should look like until the toxicity of it all almost killed me.''
However, choosing to be free of cosmetic surgery wasn't something that was immediate.
She continued, ''Your health is your wealth so please make educated decisions, research the partial information you’re given by our broken system before putting anything foreign in your body. It took me many years of undoing some bad choices I made for myself before I finally found the freedom to sustainable internal beauty and acceptance of what is the best version of myself by no standards but my own.''
She added, ''It’s on us to learn to love our selves and celebrate our unique, one of a kind beauty at all ages as we move through this journey called “life”. Beauty has no meaning without your health.''
The man in question is accused of ejaculating on the woman before walking away, after following her for about two kilometres before the attack.
The teenager’s clothes have been taken by the Gardaí to be tested for DNA evidence. A significant amount of CCTV evidence has also been recovered.
A spokeswoman for the Gardaí confirmed officers were investigating “an alleged sexual assault on a female on Lower Kilmacud Road, Dublin on 10th January 2019 at 7pm”.
Leonardo DiCaprio has faced backlash recently over his use of a private jet- despite consistently campaigning for environmental issues.
It must be a 'New Year New Me' kind of vibe, as the 44-year-old Once Upon A Time in Hollywood actor was spotted flying commercial with his (baby) 21-year-old girlfriend Camila Morrone.
He's faced a lot of criticism since emails from film studio Sony were hacked in 2014, and revealed he took SIX private jet flights in just six weeks, costing $177,550.
The actor was spotted in JFK airport heading to a commercial flight on Sunday night, after his own carbon footprint was called into question despite all of his activist causes.
The Wolf of Wall Street star really was trying his best to keep a low-profile, covering his eyes with a baseball cap and sporting dark, casual clothing.
However, his young girlfriend stood out in a bright red puffer jacket, maybe she didn't get the whole secrecy memo? A TSA agent eventually forced Leo to show his face, just like us plebs have to do.
The model and Hollywood icon were first linked in December of 2017 when DiCaprio was seen leaving her home in LA.
Image: JustJared
DiCaprio was initially slammed back in 2016 for taking a private jet to… collect an environmental award. Oh Dear Leo, bit hypocritical?
He used his acceptance speech at the 2016 Academy Awards to campaign for environmental causes, preaching to lawmakers to stop procrastinating climate change aid.
"Climate change is real. It is happening right now. It is the most urgent threat facing our entire species. We need to work together to stop procrastinating…Let us not take this planet for granted. I do not take tonight for granted."
The Titanic star also set up the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation, totally "dedicated to the long-term health and well-being of the Earth’s inhabitants" and has been renowned for its conservation work.
Many of us know the 'symptoms' of falling in love; dry mouth, racing heartbeat, nervous sweating (hey- no judgement here) and even dizziness.
Be it love at first sight, a lustful locking of eyes across the room, fizzling sexual chemistry or even just plain HORMONES; it's a massively powerful experience.
Seeing as Valentine's Day, dread it or delight in it, is only 31 days away, we've decided to get our reading glasses on and find the science behind LURVE.
We're not the only publication carrying out extensive and important research into Cupid; scientists at the University of California have delved deeper to attempt to discover what happens to our bodies.
Apparently, that euphoric high that can occur when the flame is lit might be due to your GENES, according to Stylist.
The University of California were itching to discover how love affects the genes which control our immune systems, and took blind samples from 47 young women as they engaged in brand new relationships.
Genetic changes were monitored as the women fell in love over the course of two years with a new partner, and the scientists recently published their findings in the journal Psychoneuroendocrinology.
According to the researchers; “Falling in love is one of the most psychologically potent experiences in human life. New romantic love is accompanied not only by psychological changes, but physiological changes as well.”
The journal claims that when the women in their sample fell in love, their genes produces interferon- a protein most commonly deployed to fight viruses within the human body.
"These findings are consistent with a selective up-regulation of innate immune responses to viral infections… and provide insight into the immuno-regulatory correlates of one of the keystone experiences in human life,” the scientists claim.
As women later fell out of love with their respective partners, their production of interferon was reduced. WHOA.
The experts assert that; “Some research suggests that psychological changes associated with romantic love may be attenuated as the relationship matures,” the experts said.
“The biological correlates of love might abate with the maturation of a longer-term more stable mate bond.”
Though the scientists don't yet know the exact reason for women producing an increase of interferon, they're pondering the idea that it may be to prepare for PREGNANCY. Whoa x2.
Researchers now believe that men's genetic response probably isn't the same as women's. Typical lads.
The 'feel good' neurotransmitter dopamine is distributed across our brains when the ventral tegmental area and caudate nucleus work in tangent with each other.
Basically, in English this means that as we become romantically involved with someone, we start craving their presence.
The craving gets deeper as we fall more deeply in love with them, hence the feeling of lovesick obsession.
Experiencing heartbreak can also affect our bodies, apparently.
No, not just bloating from all that Ben & Jerry's.Though that's a definite contributing factor…
Intense rejection activates the area of our brains that deal with physical pain, and research alleges that our bodies are literally more physically sensitive when we go through a break-up or romantic rejection.
