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arguments

New research suggests that social media is becoming a "common problem" in Irish marriages, according to The Independent.

Over 3,000 clients took part in a survey in Maynooth over two years which discovered that both men and women find social media and technology "behaviour" causes difficulties in marriages and relationships.

Accord Catholic Marriage Care Service maintains that constant access to technology and phones has taken away the "cooling off" period following an argument.

The Accord has commented that it will alter it's service to accommodate the issue following couples' feedback.

Bishop Denis Nulty, president of Accord and Bishop of Kildare & Leighlin, said: "Social media is a huge issue. Pope Francis spoke about this at Croke Park and we need to be digitally conscious."

He elaborated on why the results are vital for the organisation; "We're dictated by gadgets so being clued-in is important."

On the removal of the "cooling-off" period he said: "When you send a text, a tweet or a Whatsapp message, there's no way of pulling it back, and it causes huge heartache for everyone involved."

"As we shape our marriage preparation courses in the future, we'll be taking this into consideration," Bishop Nulty mused.

"We have a low divorce rate in Ireland, and I would like to keep it low. I have no doubt people in Ireland still take marriage very seriously."

16,048 individuals attended the Accord's marriage preparation courses across the nation in 2018, which was down almost 800 from 2017

Accord counsellors separately provided 24,180 counselling sessions to individuals and couples during 2018 throughout the whole island of Ireland, which was less than that of 2017.

The bishop attributes some of the drop in figures to couples attending different private counselling services.

Other "problem areas" included unresolved arguments, inappropriate behaviour during arguments and dissatisfaction with their sexual relationship.

75 per cent of clients who saw data reviewed claim that their relationship improved following counselling.

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Azealia Banks is a woman of controversy, and her career has arguably been stalled and stopped multiple times because of her numerous spats with famous faces.

While Paddy Power was taking bets on whether or not the Harlem rapper would even play her set at The Academy last night, the 27-year-old miraculously showed up onstage.

She dedicated her gig to "All the beautiful Irish women", much to the amusement of the crowd of beloved fans who admitted that their rap hero was 'problematic', but has such good tunes you forget about it.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Glen Bollard Photo (@gbollardphoto) on

Banks hit the headlines yesterday after an incident on board a flight from Gatwick to Dublin airport, which led to the artist having to take the ferry to Dublin.

She ended up having quite the rant on board the Aer Lingus flight, calling Irish women 'ugly' and launching into a tirade about our Celtic people.

“I’ve had enough of y’all oompa-loompa looking, spray-tanned, crazy-looking b****es tonight,” she raged, which was characteristic of her numerous feuds with other musicians.

“The girls have scurvy, they’re vitamin deficient, need some calcium tablets.”

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Kunt Brigade (@azealiabanks91) on

Reviews of the show claim the rapper brought an impressive set to her debut Irish show, channelling talent which is arguably gone to waste as her Twitter arguments have only done her damage.

Fans know her attitude well enough to dispel any negative thoughts of her social media ranting, choosing instead to focus on her musical prowess, surprisingly soulful voice and explosive rap verses.

“I’m a rude b**ch nigga, what are you made up of?” she spits on her classic hit, 212.

The 'Queen of Ireland' doesn't make any effort to cover up her personality, so take her with a pinch of salt but don't try to deny that the gal has talent.

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We all fight with our baes, besties and family members occasionally, and it's those fights with the people who really know how to hurt you that sting the most. 

Whether it's a sly dig at a personality flaw you've been working on or an insecurity of yours that gets brought up, it's those horrible moments that really hurt.

Image result for fight gif

'When [you're] in conflict, inevitably [you] will say something that hurts the other person using the inside information that you have on them or that they have on you,' relationship expert Hal Runkel told Business Insider.

'Everything in you wants to scream something right back at them: "Oh yeah? Well, you're starting to look like your mother!'"

According to the expert, it's not 'sorry' that will bring the argument to resolution, but 'ouch' instead.

When things are getting heated, it's at this point that you can take the 'ouch' phrase out of your arsenal and use it to your advantage. 

The relationship expert explained that the best phrase to use is: 

'Ouch. That one hurt. I don't know if you were meaning to hurt me.'

'I don't know if that's what you were going for; but that's what you did.'

It sounds like the updated version of 'I'm not mad, just disappointed,' and if 'ouch' instils fear into the hearts of our opponents the way that phrase used to in our teens, we're using it.

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It's already almost two weeks into the New Year and most of our resolutions have fallen by the wayside.

Diet? What diet? And Dry January lasted all of five days, but it was a great five days.

If you're in a relationship at the moment, you no doubt made a new "New Year, New Me" promises on that front too. Don't worry though, if you're anything like us, they're already old news.

Here are just a few of the relationship resolutions you've no doubt let slip…

1. You will not slink in front of the screen looking like a slightly drunk cat when he's playing Call of Duty
"Talk to me I'm booooooooored"

 

2. You'll remember that it's OK for him to be a boy, even though he'd be SO much easier to buy gifts for if he was a girl
You'd swear he didn't WANT the new Urban Decay palette you bought him/you.

 

3. You will not tell people his morning breath smells like a recently opened vegetable drawer
Because… soundness.

 

4. You will not ask him if his mam still likes you every five minutes 
"Do you think she could tell I didn't like the (re-gifted) lavender soap set she gave me for Christmas?"

 

5. You will not wake him up at 3am because you remembered you once kissed his mate during a junior disco
"Should I feel guilty? I feel guilty."

 

6. You will not ask him to remember what you were wearing on your first date because “it was banging and he should bloody remember.”
Truth.

 

7. You will not laugh at him if he sounds slightly American when talking dirty in bed.
Only the best among us can call someone "baby" without sounding like Patrick Swayze.

 

8. You'll work on being more decisive when asked where you want to go for dinner
"Um, the Indian. No, I don't mind. No wait, PIZZA."

 

9. You will not get angry if he compares you to Chewbacca when you discover your hair straightener has burnt out.
*evil glare*

 

10. You will hide thoughtful notes around his place without seeming like a creep.
Easier said than done.

 

11. You will not force him to analyse your dreams with you because… no one cares.
"And my mam was there, but she looked really like George Clooney for some reason."

 

12. You will support his desire to “get shredded”
Even if it only lasts two weeks.

 

13. You will not laugh at him for using the word “shredded".
Mmmmmf.

 

14. You will not jokingly ask him what baby names he likes and then feel inexplicably hurt when he won't play ball.
The imaginary baby argument – it's split up many a couple.

 

15. You will not pick a fight with him because your favourite Netflix show has ended and you need something to do.
URGH JUST STOP BREATHING SO LOUD WOULD YOU

 

16. You will remind him your anniversary is approaching because he has a head like a sieve and would be devvo if he forgot.
A few not-so-subtle mentions should do the trick

 

17. You will allow him to answer honestly when you ask whether a blunt fringe is a definite no-go.
A loaded question for sure.

 

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The only thing worse than waking up with a hangover? Waking up with a hangover AND the nagging feeling you did something pretty stupid last night.

We're guessing student Lizzie Ruddy had The Fear in a big way this week, when her drunken apology went viral on Twitter.

After an argument with her boyfriend Sam Demelo, Lizzie did what any very drunk person would do and sent him a personalised greeting card with photos of her and a heartfelt (ish) apology.

Is there any opening line more beautiful than "hiya imdrunkbut im so sorry sam"?

Inside the card, Lizzie continued with more stunning prose, this time hitting Sam right in the feels with the mention of fajitas:

And of course, to finish, she added a selfie to the back of the card with the caption, "Me ^^^^ look how nice i look haha x."

Sam couldn't resist sharing the card on Twitter, where it has since had 12,000 retweets and 17,000 favourites.

We hope he accepted her apology, at least.

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No matter how rock-solid your relationship is, there are certain events that will always be a bit, shall we say, challenging.

If you and your other half have almost called it quits over an ill-fated trip to IKEA or "someone" forgetting to pack your passports for that long-awaited holiday, don't worry, you're not alone.

Here are some of the many, many everyday incidents that are bound to get tempers flaring…

1. Trying to decide what takeaway to order from
'Which one?' 'Ah, I don't mind.' 'So will we go for Domino's?' 'Nah, not in the mood.' 

 

2. Picking a film on Netflix
Too much choice is sometimes a bad thing. The WORST thing, in fact.

 

3. Meeting your other half's parents for the first time
You're tense, he's tense, they're probably tense… it's a recipe for disaster.

 

4. The first time he tags along on a girls' night (or vice versa)
So, one of the girls was meant to bring her BF too and now he can't come… roll on cocktail night with the gals (plus one boy).

 

5. The first time you two do a food shop together
"No, I only eat Heinz Beans." "Well I only eat Batchelor's." The ultimate showdown.

 

6. That "casual" game of Monopoly
An hour ago you were pals, now he's just made you go bankrupt and you're seething.

 

7. Your first holiday together
It'll be grand when you get there, you just need to navigate the airport queues, the long-haul flight, driving on the wrong side of the road, a new currency…

 

8. The morning after a drunken fight
"Well, see, you wouldn't listen to me when I said Dustin WAS in the Eurovision that one time…"

 

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There is nothing worse than the feeling of arguing with a friend. It does happen in most friendships from time to time, but it can usually be easily fixed, depending on the situation. Here are important things to consider when you want to solve a fight with your soul sister and partner in crime. 

Try talking it out
If you want to fix your friendship, don't be stubborn. Try talking it out and be the bigger person.

Try to see things from their point of view
Let them talk and listen to why they are hurt. You may not fully understand it but you have to try.

Don't back stab them
Don't start talking about them behind their back. You're emotional and vulnerable now, but as things cool off you'll regret ever opening your mouth.

Stay off social media
Don't share your current dislike of your friend with the world. This will hurt them further, annoy other people and is not a nice thing to do anyway.

Forgive and forget
Don't bring up past arguments or let this little argument affect your relationship for the next seven years. Learn to let go.

Know when to walk away
If you feel that in general the relationship is toxic, know when enough is enough and be strong enough to walk away and form new friendships.

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There are some arguments we have had with our mothers that are just a common issue worldwide. So it wasn't just your parents that were "annoying" and "unfair", maybe we were the problem? Dear god no, we take it back. Here are seven teenage arguments we are all familiar with. 

1. When you didn't call them late at night and when you did they complained 
We presumed they were in bed, we were thinking of their feelings while struggling to find a lift home at 3am. We are just so kind.

2. "Do you want help?" "No…I always have to do EVERYTHING around here."
Wait, what? That makes absolutely no sense. Just don't respond until she calms down…

3. "That dress is a bit low?"
Yes mother, it's a plunge dress. Teenage motto: If you've got it, flaunt it.

4. When they dragged you to places you didn't want to go to
Free pizza is the only positive here.

5. Asking for advice and then getting a life lecture
"Look mum, I know I shouldnt have shifted him but I didnt want your advice on that, I'm just wondering how you get a restraining order?"

6. When you said "But mum, everyone is going…" and she still wouldn't let you
And then you thought your life was over, but in fact, in two days when the Insta pics calm down you'd be over it. 

7. When you shouted at her for saying your friend gave off a bad vibe
Aaaaaand she was right. As usual. 

 

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Every couple argues from time to time, even the healthy ones. But there are a few arguments that tend to happen over and over again.

Will we ever learn?!

Here are a few of the old favourites…

1. The "no, it's YOUR turn" argument
Usually relating to cooking dinner, washing the dishes, taking the bins out or some other undesirable chore. "But I washed the dishes two days in a ROW last week!"

2. The "I'm not watching that" argument
He wants to watch Game of Thrones, but you're feeling in more of a Good Wife mood. Cue heated discussion about whose choice should win, leaving one of you grudgingly agreeing to watching what the other wants (well, hopefully).

3. The "can you just put your phone away for two seconds?" argument
You're out for dinner, but he feels NOW'S the time to check in with the lads' WhatsApp group. "Hang on, I just have to watch this 'Best Ronaldo Goals of the Last Decade' video on YouTube and then I'll be riiiight with you."

4. The "I told you to stop!" argument
Usually occurs after an innocent cuddle/tickle fight has gone wrong. You're just as likely to be the one at fault as he is… tickling is a dangerous activity!

5. The "eh… who's she?" argument
Social media is a goldmine for potential argument fodder. He's been liking that girl from work's photos an AWFUL lot lately… even if they are just snaps of the latest team-building session.

6. The "you skipped ahead on House of Cards WITHOUT me?" argument
He was away for the weekend, and you just couldn't resist the temptation to sneakily watch a new episode of your favourite TV show. All's well until he clocks the "Last Watched" section on Netflix and promptly freaks out.

7. The "what do you want to eat?" argument
"Pizza?" "No, too carby." "Indian?" "Ugh, I hate Indian." "Well, where do you WANT to eat?" "…I don't mind, you choose."

8. The "you're too drunk" argument
No drunk person can ever admit that they're actually drunk (it's a cardinal rule) so this argument is always going to end in trouble.

 

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All couples will argue. We guarantee it. It’s a fact of life. Your friend/colleague/sister might look like she has the perfect relationship, but you’re only seeing things from the outside.

As long as you’re not at each other’s throats every moment of the day, don’t worry. A little bit of arguing is healthy – and making up isn’t too bad either!

Here are nine things you and your partner have definitely had a spat about at one point or another, just like every other couple on earth!

1. Whose turn it is to do the crappiest chores
“Well, I just went to Tesco to buy milk so you can take out the bins, okay?” Those are NOT the same thing! Certain chores are definitely less desirable than others – namely anything to do with bins, smelly laundry or gone-off food.

2. Hogging the bed/duvet
This argument usually happens about 3am and you probably won't even remember it in the morning. It starts with angry grumblings from one of you, along with a sharp yank of the duvet back to the “right” side of the bed. MINE!

3. What to watch on Netflix
Having hundreds of films to choose from might seem like a good thing but it’s actually the devil’s work. Aside from picking a film, there’s the added stress of finding the comfiest couch position, deciding what to eat and of course poking your partner in the arm anytime he looks like he’s falling asleep.

4. Having your phone out at inappropriate times
There’s nothing more romantic than sitting in silence at a restaurant while your other half scrolls through Facebook on their phone. “Just two more minutes, I need to finish this WhatsApp group chat about training tomorrow night.” Great, so you should be finished in time for dessert?

5. Flirty Facebook comments
“Why did you write ‘Great picture!’ on her photo? What does that mean? Are you two friends or something?” We all get a little jealous and irrational from time to time and social media can make things even worse. There’s no way around this one except for a little understanding from both sides.

6. The snooze button addiction
If one of you is a natural early riser, it can be hard to get used to your other half’s insistence on pressing snooze five times each morning. That beep-beep-beep sound will haunt you for the rest of the day!

7. Not making an effort with your partner’s friends
This is a hard one to work through as it takes a lot of compromise. Much as the two of you might get along, that doesn’t mean he has to click with your friends, too. Even if they’ll never be besties, it’s important to make an effort all the same.

8. Excessive farting
Usually from his side, we hope! Whether he cracks one out loudly while you’re eating dinner, or unleashes a Dutch Oven on you in bed, there’s no escaping the fact that men seem to adore their own farts. Grin and bear it – at least he wants to share!

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