In celebration of one of our SHEmazing huns turning 25, we thought we would give you the low down on nine of the guys you'll probably date by the time you reach that magical age.
Here we will meet the good, the bad and the ugly men that we have encountered over the last quarter of a century.
1. The F*CK boy:
He's a legend in every women's dating history. At 18 or 20, he seems like a good idea. He feeds you with all the right lines and you swoon over him. Quite quickly he becomes that shady motherf*cker that only hits you up at 10 pm to see if you wanna come over. Suddenly his contact drops off for weeks at a time and then reappears without any explanation and acts like nothing has happened.
If you dare to question where the f*ck he has been – you’re crazy. You know he’s no good, but you’re totally taken by him because he’s a ride. By the time you get to 22 or 23, you can almost smell them out and the majority of us just won’t put up with that type of sh*t, Thank U, NEXT.
2. The Right Guy, Wrong Time
As the word’s spew from his beautiful mouth, he’s ticking all your boxes without even knowing it. You find yourself instantly attracted to his charm, humour and personality.
You both know you’d be a good fit for each other – HOWEVER, time is being a total b*tch and one of you ends up dropping the bomb shell that you’re leaving to go and travel for the next 12 months or you’re permanently moving away.
If you've experienced this recently, cut your losses and be glad it happened – and if it’s meant to be, it may workout in the future.
3. The One Who Got Away
This person is someone you’ll always hold a flame for. No matter how you try to extinguish them from your heart, once you hear their name it's game over. The memories come flooding back and the potential of what could have been.
Perhaps someone f*cked up which ended the relationship prematurely or one of you got cold feet as it heated up and ran away – but you know that you were never the same after it ended, and if you could go back and do things differently to hold onto the person, you would.
But you know that you’ll never be together, it’s a pure fantasy of what could have been. I highly recommend Katy Perry’s ‘The One Who Got Away’ to play on repeat if you’re going through this as she pretty much sums up the feeling perfectly.
4. The One
If you’ve already met your future partner and you know that it’s solid – I am one jealous b*tch.
A recent study showed that the average woman will kiss 15 men, have two-long term relationships and have her heart mushed into little pieces before she meets the one. So double congrats, because you've beaten the odds.
And if he’s a good one don’t let him go, and if he’s got any nice friends – send him my way, thanks xo.
5. The Secondary School Sweetheart:
He was your first boyfriend, both you of were inexperienced messes, but the hormones RAGING through your body attracted you to each other to explore an entirely new world.
The constant embarrassment of trying to get used to boobs and other body changes that puberty has brought can mean that a lot of these relationships were very innocent and you look back with fond memories about how easy this time was.
Going to the cinema, dinner and pretending that you knew what you were doing were the norm, and you were convinced you'd defy all the odds and end up together forever.
6. The Rebound
You’ve just gotten out of a long-term relationship and dating again is a whole new world and it’s bloody terrifying. The first person will probably be a rebound and he or she will help you through that weird gap left behind from the big break up – and there will probably be A LOT of sex.
Although these are f*cking fantastic for you, you need to be upfront and honest with the person when you figure out you are rebounding. Or if you ARE the rebound, look for the warning signs.
There will be plenty; talking about their ex, why they broke up and you will get hints that they aren’t quite ready to emotionally commit again. Don't take it personally, but RUN.
My advice would be if you’re looking for something serious or a relationship, don’t go for someone who has split for a long-term partner if it’s only been six or seven months. The territory becomes a bit safer after the ninth and there’s no sign of the relationship being rekindled.
7. The Kinda-Not-Your-Boyfriend-But-Is
Thanks to the Internet, we have entered an age where we can be in a relationship, but not actually be in one. You act like a couple, you do everything someone in a committed partnership does, but he doesn’t want to label it as it might ‘ruin the fun’. Sorry honey, but in most of these cases, the guy wants to have his cake and eat it.
If that sort of arrangement works for you, great. But more often than not, we think waiting it out will give us the girlfriend label that we crave – I will cut to the chase, you’re wasting your time.
Now, I am not telling you that you have to demand to be his girlfriend after six dates but after three to six months of dating, if it ain’t moving that way and he keeps telling you that he isn't into labels and still intros you as a friend – RUN, GAL. You’re being played.
8. The Guy with a Girlfriend or Wife
You may not know that they have a girlfriend or wife and when they drop the bomb, it’s a biggy, or maybe you do and you’re okay with it. Either way, you need to assess what you’re doing.
If you want a relationship with this person – think again. Although they might promise you the moon and stars, which includes breaking up their relationship for you, realistically, he's getting everything he wants. So why would he? He has a long-term stable relationship and he's getting a thrill from an affair. By ending his relationship he's taking a huge risk and more often than not, he won't take that leap, so stay realistic with your expectations.
Additionally, what makes you think that he won’t do the same thing again and go off with someone else when you’re in a relationship? And try to put yourself in his partner’s shoes – we’ve all been cheated on and it’s pretty sh*t.
9. The Long-Distance Lover
You've met at home or away and you've totally hit it off. You agree to give things a go from a distance. Or you've been together for a while and an opportunity means one of you have to move away but you don't want to break up. This type of relationship isn't for everyone, but if you have done this or are currently doing it, you know you'll need a lot of trust, planning and money.
Making sure you have dates over skype are important to keeping your connection alive, and organising flights and times to see each other in person will keep you both focused on those moments when you can finally get to kiss the face off him.
But it doesn't come cheap – so manage your money right and it shouldn't be an issue. And it isn't all doom and gloom, distance makes the heart grow fonder.
