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online dating

Are you consistently getting ghosted on dating apps? Tired of always being left 'on read'? Completely jaded with swiping all day with nothing to show for it, and heading on disastrous dates every weekend?

Well, RTÉ Two are here to save the dating day, with their brand new show which targets young singles looking for love; Pulling With My Parents.

The show intends to follow people from all over Ireland who are stuck in a merry-go-round of bad dates and dating apps, and who are willing to go to drastic lengths to crack Cupid.

How drastic, you ask? Parental interference…that's how drastic. 

single bad date GIF by GIPHY Dating

Basically, you'd hand over the romance reins to Mum and Dad and see what happens. Sounds dangerous to us, but infinitely entertaining to watch. Sorry, not sorry.

Parents will roll up their sleeves and give their kids' dating profiles an old-fashioned overhaul, replacing those spicy selfies with something more regal in order to find them a suitable lover.

We're sure these parents will be needing a major crash course in emoji culture, and slang for social media. However, Mum and Dad will be trying some more traditional solutions to get their kids a son or daughter-in-law.

Be it a personal ad in the Farmer's Journal, good old arranged marriage or plucking a date from the local GAA club, these parents will go the extra mile to find their kids love.

tv land tinder GIF by YoungerTV

The series will no doubt be exploring the deepest corners of the generation gap, but we're expecting to be cringing the entire time watching it.

Think First Dates paired with Sun, Sea and Suspicious Parents, and that's the show you're looking at. We have to say, it sounds absolutely gas.

Does your Mum really know what's best for you? Does your Dad know how to find the man for the job? Why not apply for a chance to be on the show and track the love of your life.

Apply for the RTÉ dating app show by emaiing dating@Alleycats.tv, and change your love life today.

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There's something about January that makes people feel the need to search for the next love of their life, apparently.

Maybe the new year just makes us feel just a lil bit… broody? The first Sunday of the new year happens to be the most popular online dating day of the calendar year, according to Hinge.

Whether you're hungry for a new job, a new place to settle or a new gal or guy to send all of our heart emojis to, the turning of time urges us to reevaluate parts of our lives which may feel lacking in some way.

tv land tinder GIF by YoungerTV

January 6 is so popular in terms of online dating apps that it has been dubbed "Dating Sunday", and industry experts are predicting that 2019 will be bigger than ever for the online love world.

Hinge analysed activity data from 2016 until 2018, and saw a massive spike in conversations, as well as far more dates being arranged and a much higher messaging response rate. Gas.

In 2017 there was an increase of 41 percent of people who began conversations on Dating Sunday than the week before- and in 2018 that figure rose to 59 percent. Jaysis, these numbers don't lie, do they?

perfect match art by GIF IT UP

62 percent more users set up dates on Dating Sunday in 2018, and Hinge also reported increased in daily user activity, with 20 percent more conversations being carried out and a 36 percent higher message response rate.

Singles who are seeking love clearly become influenced after Christmas ends and the parties simmer down, will you be swiping right today?

We might just go and update those profile pictures seeing as the competition is higher… bring on the messages, lads.

fox tv GIF by STAR

We're ready for it. *Winks*

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Ah dating – no matter how you managed to secure that first date, you've probably heard the line, wanna go for a drink?

Though it may seem harmless, this is what you need to consider before agreeing.

According to a new study by Alcohol.org, that liquid courage isn't just relaxing the nerves, they're lowering your inhibitions.

Now, I'm sure you've heard that line a hundred times, but did you know 51 percent of first dates ended up between the sheets after five or more drinks?

1,002 people were questioned for the study, Drinking on Datesabout their alcohol intake on their most recent first date – and the results are very much a mixed bag. 

So let's kick off with going cold turkey – you can probably leave your sexy underwear at home, as only 10 percent of people reported getting it at the end of a first date when they didn't drink.

BUT, they are more likely to be going on a second date than those who lock lips around four or more drinks. 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Now, there's nothing more annoying than wasting a face of makeup and an evening on a terrible date.

And for the ladies when things start to go sour, our alcohol intake lessens.

In fact 43 percent of women said they drink less when the date isn't going well – keeping those wits about you.

Interestingly, only a third of men do the same.

Perhaps the most important topic when it comes to alcohol and sex is consent.

Participates where asked how many drinks would you have to consume to consider themselves unable to give consent – and the answers were very insightful.

Split into male and female, 78 percent of men said five drinks or more, whereas 53 percent of women said the same.

But most telling is more than a fifth of women said three drinks or more would impact their ability to give consent, compared with just 9 percent of men.

Getting down to the nitty-gritty, they were then asked how many drinks would your partner/date need to consume before you believe they couldn't give consent.

If a potential lover drank five drinks or more, almost half of men would think that they couldn't give consent. 

Whereas 61 percent of women thought their date wouldn't be able to say yes, after having the same quantity.

19 percent of men said their partner couldn't give consent after 3 or more, compared to 16 percent of women.

Credit: Alcohol.org

So what does all this mean?

The correlation between people not being able to give consent after five drinks and more than half reporting having sex after that many drinks – seriously raises alarms.

Though the night might be going fabulously, and those feelings are in the air – keep in mind this study when you accept or buy another drink. 

As most things in life, moderation seems to be the best way to go, and most people opt for this.

They actively limit themselves to two drinks on a first date and score themselves a second date. –  Now, that's what we call success.

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September 12 2012 completely changed the landscape of online dating, when a pair of entrepreneurs launched an app which would connect millions upon millions of potential couples. 

Facilitating hook-ups, true love, long-term relationships and the occasional unsolicited WhatsApp dick pic, the app revolutionised the prior preconceptions people had about dating online. 

Tinder brought online dating right to our phones, making it more accessible and user-friendly for the millennial generation – and on the 6th anniversary of the app's launch, we're reflecting on six tales of wow and woe when it comes to the app. 

Terror:

'I've had more horror stories than good when it comes to Tinder, but the one that almost put me off for life (almost!) was when the guy in question met me outside the restaurant and quickly explained he'd "had one or two" in the pub across the road to calm the nerves. This was fine. Dutch courage, I get that. But the whole evening was quite bizarre. He kept insisting that I looked like I wasn't having a good time and would I prefer to just go home now? I thought, up to this point, that I had been very chatty and pleasant – I was doing most of the talking! Then our food arrived. He quickly said the food wasn't great (I had recommended the restaurant, so…opps?) and then proceeded to eat the spaghetti – with his fingers. No, I'm not kidding.

Then, dessert time. I politely say I won't have another but would he like a coffee? He says I'll just order another. No, not a drink. An entire bottle of wine. Which he drank. To himself. He stumbled out the door and down the stairs (I don't know how we both didn't topple down and kill ourselves) and to the bus stop, while I wearily went to get a taxi and thought, 'Never Again.' – Anonymous

'As a single-mum taking on the dating scene, I don’t have much time to waste. Friends gave me a gentle nudge to dip my toe back into the water by trying online dating – let the hunger games begin. First off, 90 percent of men, once they found out that I birthed a child, disappeared. Secondly, I was very selective with who I chose to go on a date with, as organising a babysitter (thanks mum), and going out – is very much a luxury for me, so I wanted to make sure I would have a good night. Whilst I did have some success with it and met one incredible guy, we all know you’re here for the ugly – so let’s cut straight to it. I get asked to drinks by what seems like a relatively nice guy, we had spoken for a while and I got those good vibes.

However, the day of the date, I find his Instagram – cue 10,000 shots of him topless – okay, we get it – you’ve got abs to die for. My gut was a little worried about my find, but my brain talked myself around in still going for a scoop (BAD CHOICE). When I finally meet ab guy; the funny, charming and talkative guy online, had nothing to say for himself. I am usually quite talkative and am comfortable around people, but his silence threw me entirely – out came my word vomit and here commenced the digging of the grave for this date. I got more and more nervous to WHY ON EARTH this guy wasn’t saying a word, despite asking him a million questions. – Was it nerves? Shyness? Or was it me? After four hours straight of talking myself into several holes; he announced he was leaving. – Probably one of 30 words he said all night. – THANK THE LORD. BUT WAIT: He INSISTED on walking me to the Luas and thatten-minutee wait for the tram was torture. It’s fair to say we never spoke again, but the moral of the story is to always find their Instagram first and always pick coffee, never a drink for a first date. – That way you don’t waste as much time and you can make a faster escape. The strong and silent type might be for some, but this was unbearable.' – Sorcha 

'Tinder is great for the old ego boost but trying to get an actual IRL date locked in was harder than trying to choose a random movie to watch on Netflix. Too many choices involved and no one willing to make any kind of commitment. This date was different though. He was Brazilian and new to Ireland, and new to Tinder for that matter, so before he could know any better I suggested we meet for a drink and he suggested ‘Tomorrow?’ Sold.

The next night dressed in Penneys best, I found myself in JT Pims (a great first Tinder date bar) waiting for my potench new Latino lover to arrive. He walked in beaming from ear to ear, enveloped me in a bear hug and offered me a drink before legging it to the bar. I settled into my seat excited for what I hoped would be hours of fun and flirting.

Two hours later I was making my excuses to leave, but not before he told me that his heart was melting for me, he wanted us to travel around Ireland together, and that he could see himself falling in love with me. He bought me a rose and kissed my hands all over and up my arm and told me I was the most amazing woman he had ever met. ‘Um, I’ve got to go now’ I said edging towards the door, worried that at any moment he would propose or cling to my feet like in some over the top Disney movie. By the time I got home he had liked every single one of my Insta pics dating back five years and had sent me five messages trying to lock in another date. Block. Unmatch. Thanks but no thanks. Back to the drawing board….' – Ariana

True Love:

'Despite having very little faith in dating apps, I met my last boyfriend on Tinder. Well, not strictly speaking. I moved in to a new apartment with my best friend, and to celebrate, we decided to throw a housewarming party and invite everyone in the building. I knocked on the door of the girl who lived directly below us, and she agreed to attend our little soiree, so long as she could bring her boyfriend. 

By the time she and her man arrived, we were all already half cut, and while I thought her beau was cute I paid him little attention knowing he was spoken for, instead investing my time in the makeshift karaoke station we had set up (aka, an open laptop perched on the kitchen counter with lyrics videos playing on YouTube, using a hairbrush and a wooden spoon as mics). We had a quick, polite conversation on the balcony having a cigarette, and that was it – I promptly forgot about him after waking up the next morning with a pounding head and no voice from screeching The Kooks songs all evening. 

A few days later I was on Tinder swiping away, and got a message – 'Hey Sarah, how have you been keeping?' After a bit of confusion over the messages' familiarity, I quickly realised who it was and immediately had a crisis of conscious after he asked me for a coffee, wondering was I about to embark on a passionate, ill-fated affair with my downstairs neighbour's boyfriend. However, we went for that coffee, he informed me that they had broken up the night of the party after I presumably seduced him with my tone-deaf rendition of The Darkness'  I Believe In A Thing Called Love, and we dated for two years. Without happening upon me on Tinder, he never would have found me as he only knew my first name. We didn't work out, but I do have Tinder to thank for connecting me with my favourite ex-boyfriend.' – Sarah 

'Okay, so I moved across the world to study in the magical, Emerald Isle. But I swear my only focus was on studying and travel. There was no room in my life for a man. At least that’s what I told myself. But after a few weeks of loneliness and some late night chats with my roommate, I decided to give the Tinder app a try – for the fun of it. It was a good compromise. I told myself to go on some dates but not have to make a commitment I’d leave behind when I returned home at the end of the year. Then one day, a guy I had matched with sent me a joke out of the blue. Curious for the punchline, I messaged him back and found myself in bits at his reply. If you know me, you know that I love a good cheesy joke. Im talking pure dad-joke material. They’re my favourite. And this total goofball was full of them.

It went on like that for weeks, I think. I found myself looking forward to his texts. This guy, mind you, was shown in those carnival-sized sunglasses and a feathery boa in his profile picture. Fast forward, to a night out in town when we were talking longer than usual and discovered we were both in town at pubs right beside each other. He asked if I wanted to meet up and I agreed, after a few beers in me.'

My heart thumping to the blaring, cringe music in Dicey’s I found him looking for me. And he was wayyy hotter than that dorky picture on Tinder. He claimed Americans couldn't drink more than the Irish, and that was it. My competitive nature took over as I proved him wrong. (We still argue to this day over which one of us won). We spent all night together, talking and laughing amidst the crazy chaos in the club. And we’ve been inseparable ever since, surviving long distance and all the other stuff that came our way for two and a half years. Who knew Tinder was the modern-day Cupid?' – Anonymous

'My first Tinder date was the best one I ever had. It was with the Dutch courage of several few whiskeys in my local that I sent the simple, ''we should meet for a drink'' before he had even messaged me. After my initial disappointment that he wasn't tall, we spent the following four hours talking, drinking, flirting, smoking – it pretty much went by in a haze of tipsy splendour. 

What followed were a few months of being inseparable, but my J1 and summer in Boston were looming so we decided to split. It was a lot harder than I thought and after a goodbye letter/email/Skype, I remember sitting in a cafe down the road from my new apartment in Boston, trying to catch the shitty rays of Wifi and crying noisily into my phone to him.  We didn't make it, but I'm smiling even now as I'm writing this because it was a happy time. 

Tinder, you might seem like you're full of arseholes but occasionally, after a few whiskeys and a risky message, you come up with a good one.' – Aoife 

 

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Okay, so we have all had experiences with guys or gals ghosting us, right?

You think everything is going well, until one day they pull a Houdini and escape from our lives forever, never answering our texts even though they seemed interested that time we went for drinks.

And even though you have totally debased yourself by double-texting, they're as ghostly as Casper but so not as friendly.

So now you're totally over them, haven't thought about them in weeks and have pulled yourself out of the ghosting funk that was haunting you, when suddenly your phone lights up with a text message.

Much to your immense shock, it's the ghost boy, back from the dead. 

This new dating phenomenon is called the zombie, and he's even more annoying than the ghost. 

 

A post shared by Lisa Bonos (@lisabonos) on

With this move, he has officially elevated himself from ghosting to being a zombie.

For all you knew, he could have been dead, but here he is, risen and walking among us. 

Attempting to resurrect a dead correspondence, especially after ghosting someone, is rarely going to go down well.

This is especially true if the zombie doesn't even acknowledge the passage of time that has occurred between the most recent message and the last one, and take some responsibility for it. 

Whether it's a straight up text message or the more subtle mind f*** of an Instagram like or comment, being a victim of the zombie really isn't nice, and can leave you wondering, "what does it all mean?"

The best thing to remember in these cases is that ghosting is seriously unkind treatment, no one deserves to be ignored by someone they care about. 

It's your choice whether or not you give the zombie another chance, but don't be surprised if they venture back into Casper territory and disappear again. 

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Online dating can be tricky business – perfectly-angled photos, witty bios and just enough sarcastic humour so your potential match knows what they're getting themselves in for.

You could easily spend hours curating your profile in an attempt to highlight your most attractive traits, but it seems those efforts could be in vain if you fail to mention one particular exercise routine.

A survey conducted by dating website Zoosk found that including the word 'pilates' in your dating profile could increase your number of matches by up to 160 per cent.

The workout was deemed to be the sexiest activity a potential partner could partake in, with 65 per cent of participants saying that it was important for them to date someone who exercised regularly.

But don't worry if pilates aren't your thing – kick-boxing, zumba and yoga were also found to be a major turn-on.

In fact, an active lifestyle is deemed so desirable that 11 per cent of millennials admitted to pretending to like exercise to impress a potential love interest.

However, if you haven't yet jumped on board the fitness wagon, all hope is not lost.

Research also found that people who expressed a love of particular food also saw an increase in matches.

It seems that the mere mention of guacamole is enough to get some people all hot and bothered, with guac-loving profiles receiving up to 144 per cent more messages.

(Definitely worth the extra €0.85 if you ask us). 

So, to sum up, if you're on the hunt for a bit of romance this Valentines' Day, pilates and Mexican food might, for once, be a winning combination. 

 

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Online dating is tricky business. 

Between picking the perfect profiler and composing a witty bio, portraying the best version of ourselves can be tough.

But, all that hard work could be in vain if your bio contains these certain words. 

A new study by dating website Illicit Encounters, has revealed the words deemed to be the biggest turnoffs in the world of online dating – and they're not what you'd expect. 

According to Mail Online, researchers looked at data from over 400,000 dating profiles and found that singles who describe themselves as ''happy'' or ''shy'' are apparently the least likely to find a match.

On the other end of the spectrum, profiles that included words like ''confident'' amd ''honest'' proved the most successful.

Phrases such as, ''humorous'', ''intelligent'', ''romance'' and ''affectionate'' also rated highly. 

A separate study conducted by the University of Iowa looked at how details included in a dating profile could affect that persons chance at finding love. 

Results showed that users who bragged about their appearance and lifestyle were deemed significantly less attractive by potential matches. 

Speaking to Mail Online, Christian Grant, head Illicit Encounters, had this to say about the findings: ''With so much competition, the world of online dating is all about fine margins; anything that's even slightly off-putting marks you as a liability.''

''Many people struggle to strike the balance between confidence and arrogance, instead adopting an overly modest approach, but that rarely works. Who wants to go out with someone who describes themselves as shy and introverted? Nobody, that's who.''

''It's no surprise to see that both men and women are looking for someone whose honest and confident.''

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When it comes to online dating, first impressions are everything.

You may have chosen your most flattering photos and crafted a suitably witty bio, but all that effort could be in vain if you're not wearing the right clothers, a new study has shown. 

Research conducted by Hater, a dating app that matches users based on their mutual dislikes, has found some of the most common deal breakers for women looking to match with men.

According to Mashable, the team looked at data from its 400,000 users and divided the men into two categories – those who were swiped right on the most, and those who were swiped right on the least.

After the profiles were analysed, the team discovered that women were hugely turned off by men who wore cargo shorts (those Khaki things with the pockets your dad use to wear on holidays) or expressed an interest in Pokemon Go or Windows computers.

On the other end of the scale, it seems men are deemed more attractive if the dress in 'preppy' clothes, eat superfoods and drink PBR (an Instagram-friendly American larger loved by hipsters).

So basically, women are looking for the stereotypical jock from ever American high school movie ever made, but given that the study was conducted on a relatively small scale, we're going to take these findings with a pinch of salt.

After all, one woman's trash is another woman's treasure.

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When it comes to dating and looking for love, we all want to present ourselves in the best possible way to a potential lover. 

Dating apps and sites have made it seriously easy to tailor the perfect profile that shows what you are like as a person – but does it really?

Kittenfishing is a brand new online dating phenomenon which is plaguing the modern dating scene. 

Kittenfishing is when a perspective dater sells themselves on their dating profile a little too well,  through perfectly posed photos that maybe don't show the reality of what they look lie 99 per cent of the time, through rounding up their height or having a helping hand from friends in sending those Tinder replies. 

A kittenfisher’s profile is full of filtered or Facetuned photos and funny biographies that don't reflect the humour capabilities of that person IRL. 

I mean, it's easy to be hilarious via text when you have a few minutes you think of a response, but that might not translate when you actually meet up. 

Hinge, a platform for modern dating advice, found that 38 per cent of men report being kittenfished after meeting an online date for an IRL encounter. 

The study also showed that 24 per cent of women feel that have been kittenfished.

However, only two per cent of men and one per cent of women report having kittenfished someone else, so we think there are a few kittens in denial. 

While kittenfishing definitely isn't as bad as it's counterpart catfishing, it's still something to be wary of. 

'We have to wonder if people think this is harmless or if people do it intentionally,' realtionship expert Nikki Leigh told Bustle. 

'They may figure they'll shave a few (or more) years off their age to make themselves seem more attractive to grab a person's attention.'

'Or they may post a picture when they were thinner, so they can get more attention in the beginning.'

'It's sad they don't realise that they aren't doing themselves any favours and they are actually hurting their own chances if they are really looking for a date or love and they are hurting other people.'

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Online dating is tricky business. Between picking the perfect profiler and composing a witty bio, portraying the best version of ourselves can be tough.

Sure, you may have gathered an impressive number of matches, but how many of these potential suitors have you actually talked to?

It’s fairly common practice nowadays, but according to Erika Ettin, relationship coach and founder of dating site A Little Nudge, this is just one of the ways we’re shooting ourselves in the foot when it comes to finding love online.

“You’ll find an exception to every rule, but my background is analytical, and I’m an analytical person,” she told Business Insider.

“So if something works 99 per cent of the time, that’s what I’m going to recommend. You’ll always find the 1 per cent and that’s fine, but I’d rather give you a better chance.”

Explaining how to get the most from online dating, Erika compiled a list of the 13 worst mistakes we all make:

1. Not writing a bio 

2. Just writing your height 

3. Too many pictures 

4. Your first picture isn’t your face 

5. No full body photo

6. No interesting photos 

7. Pictures with other people 

8. Nothing but group pictures 

9. Too many pictures of people of the opposite sex

10. Boring conversation starters 

11. No momentum 

12. Talking too much over text 

13. Keeping a backlog of the matches you never talk to

You’re propably sittiing there nodding along thinking how annoying it is when you come across a profile like this – but how many are you guilty of?

Curate your profile to show your best self (without exagerating the truth) and you’ll turn those matches into dates in no time.

So now you know – visit GoDateNow.com to get started.

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Online dating can be oddly addictive.

At first, you convince yourself you're just in it “for the laugh”, but before you know it, you're two hours deep in a marathon swipe session, trying to pinpoint the exact moment you lost all self-control.

Sound familiar?

If so, it might not surprise you to discover that single millennials spend a whopping 10 hours a week looking for love online.

Dating site Badoo.com surveyed its 370 million users worldwide in an effort to gain a deeper insight into today's modern dating trends – and the results were very interesting indeed.

Results showed that men spent an average of 85 minutes per day on dating apps, with each session lasting 9.7 minutes.

Whereas women spend 79 minutes a day on dating apps, typically browsing for 7.6 minutes each session to find a potential partner.

A spokesperson from Badoo.com, who commissioned the research said: “One question we get asked a lot, is how much time do people really spend swiping for ‘the one’?”

“These results give one of the first insights into how long [users] spend in pursuit of love.”

“And it will come as no surprise that time is no barrier for most people.”

According to the study, female users log on to dating apps and average of 10 times a day, while men fall just short of the top spot with and average of nine times per day.

Sure it might sound like a lot, but it could end up being worth it in the end. 

And hey, when you do eventually find 'the one' you can use that free time to go on cute, real-life dates! 

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Dating apps like Tinder and Bumble may have a role to play in the increasing amount of sexually transmitted infections being reported in Ireland, according to doctors.

It's believed that the laid-back attitude associated with online dating may we changing the way we think about casual sex, thus contributing to the increased risk of exposure to STIs.

Dr Ilona Duffy believes that young people are showing less concern for things like unplanned pregnancy and infections, than the generations before them.

"We're seeing the likes of Tinder, other websites where people are hooking up purely for sex and people, young people especially, don't have the same hang ups as they had years ago – worrying about pregnancy, worrying about STIs, worrying just about their reputation," she said.

"So it is very different. While it is fine to be on Tinder etc and meeting up people for casual sex – you've got to take precautions and I think that's not out there," she said.

She also said that an improvement in Ireland's sex education system is need to decrease the prevalence of STIs in Irish society.

However, she did point out that the growing number of sexual health clinics around the county could behind the inflated figures.

To protect yourself from STIs, make sure to use condoms during every sexual encounter, and avail of free, regular STI screenings.

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