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life

Being on planet earth for a quarter of a century is quite something, you know?  

When you're any age, you think you know everything and that there's nothing more you could possibly learn.

It's naivety, and we are all afflicted by it at various points in our lives. But I've realised as the years tick by, that I feel I know less than I used to.

Maybe it's youthful arrogance that fades but whatever it is, I hit my 25th birthday and felt like I'd gotten more stupid.

Twenty-five is a funny age, it sounds more adult than 24 and it feels like you kinda have to start getting your shit together. You're young, sure, but you're not young

So, with all that rambling done, I thought I'd impart some wisdom (that term should be used loosely) that I've gathered in my 25 years and hope that it helps some of you. 

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1. Not everyone is going to like you and that's tough

It's horrible the first time you cop that someone isn't your biggest fan…and you've done f*ck all to make it so.

While it stings, the reality is – if someone knows the real you and doesn't wanna be best mates, it's their loss and definitely not yours. 

2.  Friendship takes work

Like, hard work.

The first few months and even years might be plain sailing, but it always hits a road bump.

Because that's life. If you give up after a bad row, you didn't deserve the friendship. People are flawed and things aren't always rosy but if your friend is someone you want to keep in your life, don't risk losing them. Dig deep and sort it out.  

3.  Your mother is (almost) always right

This isn't an easy one to admit but I've learned that it's true. 

Listen to her when she gives unasked-for advice about relationships/jobs/health/friends. Just don't tell her you are. 

4.  Pretending to know something is a waste of time

''You know in The Jungle Book when…'' I've never seen it. There, I said it.

Own up to not knowing things. It doesn't make you look stupid, just genuine. 

5.  People's behaviour is rarely to do with you

Your boss a bit off today? Is your best friend being cold in her messages?

Newsflash: the world doesn't revolve around you.

They're more than likely have a shitty day and it has nothing to do with you. 

Or else, assume it hasn't until they tell you otherwise. 

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6. Try to do things without wanting something in return. 

Want to end your bf/gf a sweet message? Do it.

But don't do it because you want a sweet message back, do it because you want THEM to get a sweet message. 

7. People act certain ways for reasons

I used to be – and still am, working on it – massively judgemental.

If a friend didn't want to go out, I'd be like ''For feck sake, how boring are they?'' but sometimes people do things for their own personal reasons that are none of my business and I have to keep that in mind. 

8.  Pee after sex…seriously 

UTIs are no joke. 

9. If you love someone, tell 'em 

Sounds like a no-brainer but if you feel it, say it. 

10. You can't force someone to love you…and you can't force someone to be someone they're not

It's sad but true.

If you're trying to make someone love you or fancy you, they aren't for you. 

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11. Wear the mini-skirt

You only get this banging body in your 20s so show it off – also show it off at whatever age you want but definitely now. 

12. Wear your retainer 

Braces are cute once…not twice. 

13. Heartbreak is one of the greatest things that can happen to you

It sounds ironic but it's true.

It's the most disgusting thing to have to go through but there's something that being so vulnerable does to you…it opens you up in a totally cool way.

It makes you talk to random people, it makes you look at yourself – really look at all the ugly bits that you'd rather not and want to do something about them. 

It teaches you humility and shows you how strong the bond of love is..it's fascinating.

There's that quote about learning more when you're miserable opposed to when you're happy and it's kind of true. Embrace heartbreak, I say. 

14. MIND YOUR SKIN

It'll thank you later for giving it water and cleansing it after a night of booze. 

15. Jealousy is silly

It doesn't do anyone any favours.

Trust people until they give you a reason not to…it's something I really have to work on. 

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16. Get help if things are shite

Things get too much, talk to a professional. It's harder to book that first session with a counsellor than you might think but it is so worth it.

Life is tough enough- help yourself when you can. 

17. Like yourself because you spend an awful lot of time with yourself 

It does what it says on the tin. 

18. Try new things, things that scare you – hiking, food, movies, music 

I'm kind of prejudice against certain foods or movies (Westerns, anyone?) but giving something different a go once in a while broadens the mind.

And it means you always have something to talk about. 

19. People you love will hurt you

Sometimes it's deliberate, something not. It's because they're human.

Forgiveness is a wonderful thing – it frees you. 

20. Spend time with family – they won't always be there 

Visit your grandma for a cup of tea and ask her about her life in the 1960s.

Ring your aunt and have a gossip.

Have a pamper night with your sister or cousin – they're ready-made mates that you're so lucky to have. 

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21. Doing things alone is fun

Sitting in a cinema alone is THE BEST.

Have dinner alone and don't give a f*ck what anyone thinks – they're probably in awe of you and jel that they're not doing it.

You don't always have to surround yourself with people – be good with being by yourself. 

22. Trust your gut

We tend to ignore when the tiny voice in our heads warns up against something, or something just feels off in a relationship or job.

Your intuition will serve you so well – if only you tune into it. 

23. You're not a nice person, sometimes 

This is a tough one.

You are flawed. At times you're selfish, mean, hurtful and rude.

You might not mean it or realise it but we are all selfish at times.

Try to be aware when family members tell you about your weak points.

24. Eat the local cuisine 

I went to Budapest and had a safe meal – and kicked myself afterwards. 

When in Rome, as they say – always try local food and drink because that's what will enrich your life and you never know, you could stumble upon your new fave dish. 

25. Kiss – a lot 

It's free, burns calories and it's FUN. 

You'll be 90-years-old one day so you might as well kiss as many rides while you can. 

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Getting older is something that we all have to face.

Yeah, it's terrifying and especially in the world we live in today where everyone is expected to be a CEO at 30.

So it's no surprise that Hollywood A-listers feel the pressure just as much as us mere mortals.

Vanessa Hudgens is one who has opened up about her mid-life crisis that she went through at  27.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Appearing in PEOPLE's Beautiful Issue, she said, ''I remember waking up at 27 and that was the first moment where I was like, ‘Oh. I am not a kid. I’m not a teenager. I’m an adult and I have responsibilities.' I felt like I had no idea who I was or what I wanted or what I was going after.''

While it freaked her out, it did help her refocus her life.

She revealed, ''I’m very grateful for it because then it forced me to reassess who I am and what I believe in, therefore giving me just a better understanding of myself. Now that I’ve reached 30, it’s so nice feeling free to just speak your mind.''

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Getting older is great, but Vanessa confessed that their are some downsides.

She said, ''I thought being 30 I wouldn’t have to deal with breakouts anymore and it’s something that I still deal with.''

She continued, ''As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realised that my face is the only one I got, so I have to be good to it.”

Preach girl, now we're off to buy some anti-wrinkle cream and sort our lives out.

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Drew Barrymore has gotten real about the breakdown of her marriage. 

The 43-year-old has taken to Instagram to speak openly about her relationship with her former husband, actor Will Kopelman. 

The actor posted snaps of herself and Will and penned empowering message about what she has learned from her divorce.

She wrote, ''Once upon a time…I remember reading an article that said I had gotten my happy ending after all.''

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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She continued, ''Looking at this picture, it sure looks that way. And then, like many times in life for all of us, our plans change and our dreams are adjusted. But that doesn't mean that every second wasn't worth it. And if that DeLorean time machine pulled up every day, I would do it all over again. After all, I did get my dream. 2 healthy girls.''

She added, ''Will and I continue to marvel at what we made and try to be the best co parents we can be. It’s not always easy and the point is…nothing in life is. But it doesn't mean that any bitter outweighs the sweet!''

Drew split from Will in 2016 after three years of marriage. 

The pair are parents to two daughters – six-year-old Olive and four-year-old Frankie. 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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It’s not the first time that Drew has opened up about what really goes on behind closed doors in her life.

She also posted a make-up free photo of herself crying on Instagram alongside another important message.

She wrote, ''What I propose some days are great and beautiful. Sure, I can be this with two hours of hair and makeup and amazing photography and lighting. I also feel beautiful after a sweaty workout…But it all takes work! Which is good because we can achieve it.''

She continued, ''What I can’t hide is that some days are difficult and not so pretty…But sometimes life can just get to you and take you down for a minute! But we cry and then pick ourselves up and put one foot in front of the other.''

Drew is as relatable as ever and it's a good reminder that everybody has it tough at times – so let's be kind to each other. 

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Jennifer Aniston has had her fair share of headlines over her lengthy career in TV and movies.

But now, on the cusp of hitting her milestone 50th birthday, she says that she is perfectly content with how her life is – and her career is certainly going from strength to strength.

She sat down with ELLE magazine to open about her life, love and how she's won't let her age get in the way of having a family.

The public's fascination with her

The media have been obsessed with Jennifer since her days of Friends – when is she getting married? Is she pregnant? When will she get pregnant?

She believes that using marriage and children as the ultimate marker of female happiness is a way to disempower successful women.

She says, ''What quantifies happiness in someone’s life isn’t the ideal that was created in the ’50s. It’s not like you hear that narrative about any men.” 

She added, ''Why do we want a happy ending? How about just a happy existence? A happy process? We’re all in process constantly.''

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Womanhood

Jennifer is keen to make sure that women know that they have other options – that being a wife and mother aren't the only ones.

She said, ''We live in a society that messages women: By this age, you should be married; by this age, you should have children. That’s a fairy tale. That’s the mould we’re slowly trying to break out of.''

How has the media's response to her not having kids affected her?

She said, ''It’s such a shallow lens that people look through. It’s the only place to point a finger at me as though it’s my damage – like it’s some sort of a scarlet letter on me that I haven’t yet procreated, or maybe won’t ever procreate.” 

Is a family something she wants?

She said,  "Who knows what the future holds in terms of a child and a partnership – how that child comes in…or doesn't? And now with science and miracles, we can do things at different times than we used to be able to."

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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Her marriages

The actor has been married twice – to Brad Pitt from 2000 to 2005, and Justin Thereoux from 2015 to 2017.

She believes that her unions have been successful.

She said, ''When they came to an end, it was a choice that was made because we chose to be happy, and sometimes happiness didn't exist within that arrangement anymore."

Sure, there were bumps, and not every moment felt fantastic, obviously, but at the end of it, this is our one life and I would not stay in a situation out of fear. Fear of being alone. Fear of not being able to survive. To stay in a marriage based on fear feels like you’re doing your one life a disservice. 

Social Media

Jennifer is not a fan of social media – and for good reason. 

She said, ''The one thing I have is maintaining this little circle of sanctity that’s my own.''

She added, ''If I’m sitting here posting something about my dogs or I’m Boomeranging my coffee mug in the morning, that’s just giving away one more piece of something that is mine."

Her relationship with her mum

Jen was famously estranged from her mum, former model Nancy Dow, for years.

She opens up about their strained relationship, which began when she was a kid and her mother was focused on Jennifer's physical appearance.

Jennifer said, ''It wasn't her fault, it's just the things she would teach me…It didn't instil a lot of security about how I felt about my physical appearance."

She continued, ''I think she was just holding on and doing the best she could, struggling financially and dealing with a husband who was no longer there. Being a single mom in the ’80s I’m sure was pretty crappy.”

We're sure 2019 will be another stellar year for Jennifer – and that she will continue to live her life according to her own rules. 

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Men.

Can't live with 'em, can't live…hang on. .

Scratch that.

Why can't we live without them? 

All they really do is cause us stress, worry, irritation and heartache tbh.

And if you needed solid proof of that, than look no further than Mary Norris, who celebrated her 100th birthday on December 3. 

Born days after the First World War ended, Mary is the last surviving of her ten siblings and credits her long life to a few things. 

Number one, is the fact that she never married – and I think we can all agree that that lifted significant emotional worry and stress from her life.

What's that old quote again?

''I used to be married…but I’m much better now'' – rings true doesn't it? 

She was 22 when the Second World War started and she was working in a munitions factory in Edinburgh – in fact, she hasn't stepped out of Scotland in her whole life. 

Now living in St Andrew's Court, the housing manager Lynn McCusker said, ''Mary is always on the go. She’ll occasionally treat herself with a trip to the hairdressers, too.''

She added, ''She loves to dance and enjoys a sherry, so maybe that’s the secret.''

Sherry and avoiding all men?

Sounds like the dream life to us. 

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It's that time of year again – Budget day is upon us.

Minister for Finance Paschal Donohoe announced the 2019 Budget today in the Dail amidst rumours of new tax cuts and spending increases.

He opened with, ''we will protect the most vulnerable in our society.'' 

So here are the main points of information from the Budget about how it will affect you.  

Taxes

Expenditure on capital next year will be €7.3million with the Minister saying, “I am allocating an additional €1.4 billion for schools, universities, public transport, and other important infrastructure projects in 2019, bringing total expenditure on capital next year to €7.3 billion.”

Its good news for workers as the Universal Social Charge is set to be lowered by 0.25 percent (meaning roughly an extra fiver a week) and threshold which people hit the higher tax band, 40 percent rate of income tax, will rise by €750 from €34,550.

As well as that, the threshold at which people hit the lower 2 percent rate of USC, (incomes between 12,000 and 19,000) will be widened by €500, taking into account the 25 cent increase in the minimum wage. Home carers tax credit is increasing by €300 and the earned income tax credit for the self-employed is up €200.

Health

“I am announcing a further increase of €1.05 billion in Health funding for 2019. This brings the health budget to €17 billion. This is the highest level of Health investment in the history of the State.”

Patients under the Drugs Payments Scheme will be happy to hear that the monthly cut-off charge on medicine is reduced to €130 from the current level of €134.

Prescription drug charges reduction from €2 to €1.50 for medical card holders.

Housing

The housing crisis has also been looked at, with €2.3billion has been allocated to the housing programme in 2019, with an extra €150 million will be allocated for the housing assistance payment. There will be €1.25billion for 10,000 new social homes in 2019. 

He said, ''more new homes will be provided this year than any year in the past decade''

Thresholds for affordable housing applicants set at €50,000 for single applicants and €75,000 for dual applicants.

Social Life

Cigarettes have gone up an extra 50 cent while booze prices remain the same. 

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A Reddit user has shared the most moving list of things cancer patients will miss the most when they pass away. The emotional post really opens your eyes to just how valuable the little things are like kisses on the cheek and the smell of flowers.

The user shared: “The things my patients say they'll miss the most are NOT seeing the World Landmarks, buying fancy things, that new car, "living it up" party style, etc.”

The patients didn’t care about visiting Paris or seeing their favourite band in concert. The things they were going to miss were simple but so meaningful.

The full list reads:

Watching my sons throw a baseball

Listening to my grandparents tell stories

My girlfriend surprised me with a kiss on the cheek

Holding my wife in my arms knowing there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be

Gram's Sunday dinners and the whole family getting together

My dog

 

Seeing my fiancé smile and feeling his arms wrap around me

My daughter running to me when I get home

The smell of flowers and rain

The day I got married. I said I never would. And then I met her. And now I have to leave her.

Smelling the fireplace on Christmas morning with the family

All my friends

Watching my family sleep

The rush of weekday mornings. I know it sounds crazy, but I'll miss it. I'll miss the coffee, the crowded bathrooms, my wife's quick peck goodbye, the kids forgetting their lunch.. you get my point
Rain. Is that weird?

The heartbreaking list shows you that at the end of the day it isn’t about money or glamour, it’s about the people you love, those simple moments you experience every day, but ones you’ll miss more than anything when your time on this planet comes to an end.

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Ah, another day, another person telling us we're doing things wrong.

And in this case, we're all apparently making tea wrong.

The cheek of someone telling us Irish how to make tea… pfft.

I know it's a completely frivolous thing, but it really grinds my gears.

Person Holding Silver Pitcher

We're living in an age where people have the tools (hello, Internet) to voice their numerous opinions, and while this can be a fantastic thing, it also lends itself to utter sh*te.

Twitter users, who have no beauty expertise, are telling us how to wash our hair, and Instagram fans are giving out to mothers who give their kids a peck on the cheek – and it comes to a point when it's just so tiring and ridiculous.

And the latest in a long line of 'experts' is William Gorman, of the UK's Tea and Infusions Association, who has come out today to say that we're all ruining our beverages by reboiling the water.

He obviously hasn't heard of the water charges over here in Ireland…

Person Holding White Ceramic Coffee Cup Leaning on Brown Wooden Table

But in all honestly, 1) we probably knew this in the first place and 2) do we really care?

William told The Telegraph: "Usually when people’s tea goes cold they reboil the kettle and make another cup. But doing this you are guaranteed to give yourself a dull cup of tea.

"You need freshly drawn water for a good cup because reboiling it takes out all the oxygen and nitrogen out of it."

When Cosmo commented on Will's views, they quipped "WHO KNEW," but we're giving the right old stance of 'who gives a f*ck'.

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So, from now on, we're going to stop listening to all these 'experts' telling us that we're living our lives wrong, because guess what? We're going to live our lives the way we want to.

#RantOver… I'm going to reboil the kettle.

Oh, and while we have you; don't forget to have your say in the inaugural SHEmazing Awards this May! It's time to vote, and you can do it right here! 

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The hashtag #IfAnythingSchoolTaughtMe is trending on Twitter, and we can relate extremely well to some of the posts. 

From being asked to answer a question even when your hand wasn't up to learning to text while still looking at the teacher , people are pointing out some seriously accurate descriptions of what you really learn from school. 

If anything school taught me:

"How to forge my parents signature"

"Nothing about how to do my taxes"

"If you ask a teacher enough questions about their personal life, you won't have to do anything"

"How to draw this"

"How to write an essay that is supposed to take 2 weeks to write the night before it's due"

"Half the classes we take we will never use in the real life world.."

"Me: Can I go to the bathroom?
 Teacher: Idk can you?
 Me: May I?
 Teacher: No. "

"Teachers will only ask for homework the days you didn't do it"

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When we’re having a bad day, it can be so easy to dive straight into the dark abyss and stay there till the next day.

Nobody likes being in a bad mood so why not try some ways you can perk yourself up and feel better in no time.

1. Bake
The smell of cookies is enough to get anyone happy so get baking for an instant mood lift. If you’re not the measuring type, just buy cookie dough. It totally still counts and we won’t tell a soul.

2. Work out
Exercise is known to lift your mood and make you happier so get those runners on and hit the road. The hardest part is always getting out the door – remember that. If weather is against you, try doing a simple video on YouTube in your bedroom for some you-time.

3. Read
Picking up your favourite book, or a brand new one will transport you to another world and hopefully allow you reflect on what has you in a bad mood.

4. Drink tea
Having a quiet cuppa makes everyone a little happier – right?

5. Use essential oils
Inhaling scents such as grapefruit, lemon, neroli or ylang ylang are known to lift a bad mood and clear the mind. Fill a hot bath and add some drops of essential oil, inhale and relax…

6. Call a friend
If you’re feeling down about yourself, call someone you love and tell them how you feel. A few loving words of advice can have you on the right track in minutes.

7. Paint your nails
Looking down at lovely manicured nails and feeling good doesn’t make us shallow and don’t listen to anyone who says otherwise. If you’re feeling blue, book a trip to the nail salon, pick the brightest, happiest colour you can find and sit back. Sometimes we all need a small pick-me-up after all. 

8. Eat yourself happy
In general, eating makes us pretty happy. But particular foods can be great for lifting your mood so chomp on things such as nuts, fish, chocolate and spinach for an instant mood boost. 

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In today's world, we are met daily – if not hourly – with sad, tragic stories from around the world. 

Every now and then, it's important to remind ourselves that there IS good in the world – which is why we just love this video. 

An advert for Samsung sees an entire town in Turkey taking the time to learn sign language so they can show hearing-impaired Muharram what it is like to be in a world with no barriers. 

His reaction is bemusement and when he learns what has really happened, he is so touched and is brought to tears – as were we if we are being honest! 

Just remember – there is love out there! 

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Life can throw us some serious curveballs and it’s not always easy to know the best way to deal with them.

Here are some of life’s awkward situations and how you can come out on top and stay classy.

Someone throws you shade on social media
Ooh, you have the perfect response but it’s important to think first; do you really NEED to reply to shade? The sender knows you’ve seen it, and so does everyone else… so sometimes saying nothing says absolutely everything.

You messed up…bad
You’ve made a massive boo-boo and your friend is really mad at you. What now? Apologise. It’s as simple as that. It doesn’t matter why it happened or who else was involved – you need to own your mistake. All you can do is hope it’s good enough but at least you’ll have a clear conscience.

You send the message to the wrong person
Yes, you could try and convince them it wasn’t about them – but come on, let’s be realistic. The best thing to do is to actually talk to them in person. If it’s in work, go over to their desk, if not, then call.

Your ex starts kissing someone right in front of you
All you want to do is go over them and drag them apart because it hurts so badly, we get it. The best way to deal with this awful situation is to stand up tall, keep strong and go on with your night. Yes, easier said than done but better than making a scene and starting a screaming match in a night club where alcohol is a huge factor.

Your best friend kissed your ex
It happens – especially in smaller communities where everyone knows everyone. The first question you need to ask yourself is: do you actually care? Like, really, really care? Or is that just your pride hurting? If you’re think you may still have feelings for him then sit her down and explain how you feel and what you would like to happen. Don’t cut her off and refuse to speak to her – she’s your friend and things happen. If you don’t care then hey, they might be happy together and you will move on to someone even better (for you). 

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