12 things that happen during a lecture after a night out

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Oct 28, 2014

Whether we are still students, or just remembering the good days – we all know how awful it is to have a hangover in a lecture. You could have just slept in, so the hardest part is actually over.

That doesn't make the rest of the lecture any easier though…

Here's the cycle of sitting in a lecture, hungover:

1. I’m Way Too Drunk For This

No no, it's been like six hours, you're definitely grrrand you think as you take the short walk into college.

2. Don’t Sit Close To Anyone

You can’t help but despise everyone surrounding you. Why are they so loud? And in the way? All you want is to find a nice corner where you can reside, undisturbed. This may be the fear.

3. The Smell Of Drink Off Me

You slowly start to realise that you smell like nail varnish remover. You turn your own stomach and begin getting paranoid about those around you.

4. It’s So Hot In Here

Too many people make it really, really warm… gonna puke.

5. Ok, Ok, Focus

Time might just fly by if you pay attention. This lecture might distract you from the constant waves of nausea.

6. Don’t Make Eye Contact With The Lecturer

Head down, take notes. They'll never know (they ALWAYS know).

7. Ok, Just Write The Date On The Page

Concentration, concentration…

8. That Projector Is WAAAAAAY Too Bright

The world hates you. You hate you. Why did you come here?

9. Uggggggh Why Am I Here?

Naptime.

10. So. Hungry.

Hot chicken roll is only minutes away – hang on.

11. FLASHBACK

There was Rock The Boat and then..NO NO NO!

12. “That concludes today’s lecture…”

Run. Run as fast as you can.

via our content partner CT

26 things that you cannot do after college

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Oct 24, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Some things are simply not acceptable once you leave college. For students, anything goes, so you better get these things crossed off your college bucket list!

1. Eating Straight From the Saucepan
Grown-ups do not eat beans from a saucepan. Think about what your mother would say if you did it at home. Exactly.

2. Leaving Dirty Dishes
If you do this as a 20-something professional, expect to have a bad time with your housemates.

3. Having a Naggin Wall
It just looks messy outside of college accommodation. Not to mention slightly alarming.

4. Midday Television
It’s not fair, we know. We miss it too. Getting to see Home and Away four hours before everyone else? Suuccckkahs!

5.Free Rent
The ride stops here kids.

6. Drinking Milk Out of the Carton
Drinking anything out of the carton in fact.

7. Not Going to College
Gone are the days when you wake up late and just decide, not today.

8. Pizza For Breakfast
Time to buy porridge, oldie

9. Morning Trips to McDonald's

10. All Day Drinking
Unless it's a Saturday.

11. Crashing Parties
‘I hear the nurses are having their class party tonight. I know Mary, we can definitely get in.’

12. Playing Like Kids
There’s no more time for rounders or water fights anymore.

13. Mid-Week Hangovers

14. Rainbow Hair Dye
There is a very small gap in life when this is acceptable

15. Sharing A Lightbulb in a House With 5 People

16. Not Paying For Bin Collection

17. Midday Naps

18. Wearing Tracksuit Bottoms Everyday

19. Practical Jokes
Never quite as funny…or appreciated.

20. Getting Naked When You’re Drunk
There comes a time when it’s no longer hilarious to dance on tables with your tights down.

21. Midnight Munchies
Ice cream with Nutella. Pizza and chips.

22. Making Excuses for Not Having Your Life Together
Not really going to work in front of your new boss.

23. Drinking for One Consecutive Week Straight

24. Not Going Grocery Shopping Once a Week
Unless you want to starve or spend a fortune?

25. Forfeiting Food Money for Drink Money

26. Binging on Your Favourite TV Show for 2 Days Straight

At least we’ll have the memories! Don’t wish away your college years, use that fast metabolism to it's full potential. You don’t get it back when it’s gone!

via our content partner CT

The emotions you go through when you lose your phone

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Oct 23, 2014

by Amber Saunders

We all know that feeling too well – it's gone. Your precious, overused phone is GONE! Now no one will know where you are, you have no Google maps to find out where to go and your life as you know it is over. Here's the emotional cycle of losing your phone:

1. Panic
You’ve patted down your pockets and realised you don’t feel your phone – it's not there!

2. Anxious
You slowly empty the contents of your pockets and bag, hoping it's secretly hidden in there…

3. Suspicious
You’re convinced you’ve been robbed. It’s better than facing the fact that you were stupid enough to lose it! Now everyone becomes a suspect.

4. Frantic
You run desperately back to the last place you had it and hope that it’s still there.

5. Hysteria
When your phone is not where you thought you left it!

6. Horrified
When you think of how you’ve also lost all your messages/pictures/phone numbers.

7. Increased hysteria
You’re starting to feel like you’re on an episode of Without A Trace.

8. Despair
As you continuously call the phone hoping someone will answer.

9. Embarrassed
As you ask anyone within a ten mile radius have they seen your phone.

10. Determined
You try your best to turn into a detective and log onto 'Find my iPhone', full of hope and determination, before you realise it’s crap and does not work unless your lost phone is connected to WiFi…

So this can eventually end one of two ways:

Immense Pleasure
As, thankfully, someone belonging to the rare kind of humanity found it and handed it in somewhere, and you promise to love and care for your phone like never before and never let it out of your sight again.

Grief- stricken
As the reality sets in and you have to come to terms with the fact you’re not getting your phone back, and even worse, someone else got a free phone from your stupidity. So you are forced to go home and use an old Nokia from the stone age and hope Santa is generous this year.

via our content partner CT

9 types of dancers you’ll meet on a night out

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Oct 22, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Everyone has their own signature and this can be a good, or a very bad thing…

We have all either seen these dancers or been these dancers on one occasion or another!

1. The Having a Good Time Dancer

They don't care who's watching, their dancing shoes are there and the floor is theirs for the taking.

2. The Person Who is Actually Great at Dancing Dancer

You stand there doing your awkward dance (see below) when suddenly they break out the Irish dancing moves…

3. The Awkward Dancer

They do not feel comfortable dancing and you can really tell. They don’t want to be here but were dragged out to the floor by their ‘friends’. They haven’t had nearly enough alcohol to even pretend to be having a good time.

4. The Ironic Dancer

Maybe they can’t dance, maybe they don’t have the confidence to try, but they don’t let that stop them from being one of the dance-floor’s favourites. They are masters of the Macerena, the Chicken Dance, the Robot, and Gangham Style. The crowd loves them and they love performing for the crowd. Like #1, they have a great time but unlike #1 they need the crowd to prove to themselves they are having a good time.

5. The Sexed Up Couple ‘Dancers’

The nightmare dancers.

6. The Wasted Dancer

You honestly can’t tell how they are still upright, and then they’ll fall to the ground. They try to bring their drinks out with them and the bouncers keep a keen eye on them. Usually they are alone which makes you wonder did they arrive like that and if so how did they get in? And looking at them giving it their all on the dance-floor, surely they’d have sweated out all the alcohol by now?

7. The Enthusiastic Floor Hogging Dancer

They are waving their arms and jumping around like no one else exists. They are having an unbelievable time. And are having it all by themselves. Too much vodka red-bulls for this chap.

8. The Girls Night Dancers

These girls are out to have a good time. They are screaming ‘This is our song!’ for basically every single song the DJ plays. We've all been these girls and it is SO much fun!

9. The Unwanted Grinding ‘Dancer’

What. The. Hell. These guys never give up either – they'll just be there, at your butt all night.

via our content partner CT

13 things you will learn in your first long-term relationship

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Oct 22, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Being in a new relationship can be all kinds of weird and wonderful. If it's your first time being with someone for more than a few months, you will definitely find yourself learning some things you never knew! Like these:

1. You will send an obscene amount of texts to your significant other

Whether it's just a kissy face emoji or a long essay on WHY you slammed the door on your way to work that morning (they should already know why), you will find that it amounts to hundreds if not thousands of messages a month. Scary.

2. You’ll find that your attention span is much longer than you originally thought

They are expecting you to know what they do so you better learn what exactly that is. "Something to do with numbers, Excel and reports" just won't cut it anymore.

3. Some of the best relationships happen with someone you would never have thought was your type

Has it really been 8 months since you started going out with that guy you thought was a total numpty? Yes, and what's more is you love him!

4. Getting along with every single one of their friends is difficult

You should definitely try and get on with his friends, it's a big part of his life. However, you can't please all the people all the time – so just be your regular charming self and don't stress so much!

5. You’ll be their drunk minder at least once

But don't worry – at some stage you'll need the favour returned.

6. Meeting the parents never gets any less awkward

They're so lovely and treat you very well – but they still know what you're up to and that will never change.

7. You’ll be surprised at how quickly you become comfortable in their company

Whip out the jammies, take the slap off and relax because if they here for good they may as well see you in your truest form now.

8. Sometimes you hate them more than most people hate Adolf Hitler

Ultimate rage…

9. But most days you love them more than Prince Harry loves a good fancy dress party

True love…

10. You’ll compromise more than you thought you ever would

When you’re single, you play by your rules and your rules only. It’s your way or the high way. You can never imagine having to sit through a rom-com or a robot war film, but you’ll quickly realise that you must give a little, in order to receive a little, in any relationship.

11. Time really does fly when you’re having fun

Everyone knows that couple who’ve been together for 9 years. Now, to the single person, a month of being with the same person seems like forever but honestly, when you’re with someone right, months can pass by in a flash and suddenly, it’s a year.

12. Grooming at an obsessive level quickly takes a backseat

You've become a bit more laid back – no need to cover up that spot quite so much for date night. After all that will just prolong the damned thing.

13. Commitment is easier than you’ve ever imagined

You've never been with someone for longer than two months before and now suddenly it's been a year – and you're not scared! In fact, you're kind of excited…!

via our content partner CT

7 places we shouldn’t cry but always do

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Oct 21, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Why is it we always end up needing to ball our eyes out in the worst possible places? It's never as easy as breaking down under your duvet – oh no, it's usually one of these inappropriate and uncomfortable gems:

1. In Work

It's never easy taking criticism and trying to fight that urge to bawl when you get in trouble is SO hard – but you need to do it.

2. In A Nightclub

Drink, girls and dancing can sometimes lead to tears – so look after yourself!

3. In A Lecture

We know that hangover is killing you – but concentrate, this stuff is important!

4. In Front Of Your Girlfriend's/ Boyfriend's Parents

Unless there's a valid reason of course, tears in front of your SO's parents are best avoided.

5. On A Date

You just met – don't do it!

6. In Front Of Your Girlfriend's/ Boyfriend's Friends

If it's a new relationship you really don't want to do this…guys are bad enough handling their own girlfriend's tears without needing to wipe yours too!

7. On Public Transport

Don't be the girl that cries on the bus, we've all been there, let's not go back.

via our content partner CT

10 things we worry about but really shouldn’t

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Oct 21, 2014

by Amber Saunders

There are a lot of things we tend to worry about – and a lot of them have to do with the way we present ourselves to the world.

It's easy to freak out when your supposed best friend posts that photo of you with the triple chin, but maybe it's time to let go a little and not sweat the small stuff so much.

Here are the 10 things we freak out about most (and shouldn't)

1. Texts we send

Oh no, what if they take that up wrong?! That's not how it was meant to sound – oh God oh God. It's gone now – no point in worrying, it's probably grrrand anyway!

2. Texts we receive

What does he mean by that?!

3. ‘…’

Silence can be deafening but often we assume a person isn't responding to our contact for some ridiculous reason when in reality they're probably out of battery.

4. Saying no

Whether it's to a guy or just something you don't feel like doing – don't feel guilty or worry about standing your ground! Peer pressure doesn't disappear after the teenage years unfortunately!

5. Compliments

Women are not good at accepting compliments. Be gracious and move on. And no, it wasn't backhanded!

6. What we order

Whether you really want the chips and order the salad or really want the salad but order the chips, remember that nobody is noticing what you eat except for YOU – so let it go and have whatever YOU want.

7. Hair removal

If he is turned off by the fact you forgot to shave your legs then it says a lot more about him than it does you doesn't it?

8. Sexual enjoyment

Sexual freedom is here and you may do whatever you please – go forth and be happy.

9. Someone else’s sarcastic comment or laughter

Sometimes people who work together or live together have very different senses of humour. One person makes a comment jokingly and the other can take that comment to mean that they are disliked by the other. All because they took the joke too seriously. Don’t always assume that people are constantly trying to bring you down. People probably aren’t talking about you and laughing at you behind your back.

10. Social media ‘likes’

Online jealousy is the most pointless thing in the world. You have your friends in the real world and you know they love you – so why care about what anybody else thinks? See, it makes no sense!

via our content partner CT

10 of the most awkward situations we find ourselves in

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Oct 21, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Life can be hard for those of us who can be somewhat awkward in certain social situations – especially the following ones!

1. Mistaking Somebody for Someone Else

You think you're talking to your friend beside you in the veg aisle about not being able to find a decent avocado in October, until you realise it's actually an old man standing beside you and he asks you what an avocado is. FML.

2. Small Talk

Your friend promises you'll know LOADS of people at the dinner party – until you arrive, realise this was a lie and spend the whole night talking to Mrs. Perky Pants.

3. Trying to Be Courteous

It's not that you're rude – quite the opposite in fact. You see a person coming down the hall and you want to keep the door open for them – but how far away is too far?

5. Trying to Be Witty

A lead balloon never looked so sad…

7. Comforting People

You see a girl crying and you know it would be nice to go and ask her if she is okay…but what if it's all a ploy to grab your bag and run away? Oh God, what to do…

8. Complaining

The. Actual. Worst. You contemplate just eating the hair in your salad.

9. Third-Wheeling

Seriously, you guys?

10. Untimely Laughter

At your great-grandaunt's funeral…while doing your prayer of the faithful. Noooo!

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10 ways Irish guys show they really like you

Relationships

Oct 20, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Does that guy like you? As in, like you like you? There's a few ways to find out…

1. He Slags You Mercilessly
To a degree, of course. But generally, if an Irish lad fancies you he will slag your clothes, call you names and comment on everything you say, this is just how Irish lads flirt. Lucky us.

2. He Talks About You To His Mates
If you introduce yourself to his mate and they already know who you are then that’s a big sign that he’s been blabbing about you to his friends. In there.

3. His Best Friend Nudges Him When He Sees You
Guys love embarrassing each other, so if you walk into the room and you see his best mate nudging him and laughing, it translates into “There’s your one you’re in love with.”

4. He Calls You Late At Night For The Chats
It’s coming up to bed time and he calls you to talk about your day or whatever, then this is a huge indication that he both wants to talk to you outside of social hours and thinks of you when he’s in bed.

5. He’ll Try Prove His Manliness
Whether it’s being able to carry twelve tents from the entrance of Electric Picnic to the site or simply carrying a box of beer from the off license, he will stubbornly refuse help from anyone else in your company in order to show his strength as a man.

6. He Treats You Differently From The Rest Of His Girl-Friends/Other Ladies
It’s important to observe this carefully. You don’t want to mistake him fancying you for him considering you a really good friend. If he like likes you, then he’ll generally focus his attention on you in a group. Also, notice if his body is turned to you for a extended amount of time.

7. He’ll Wear A Shirt
Dress to impress. This is how most Irish lads will try to show you that he wants you to find him physically attractive and receive credit for dressing up. Say you like his shirt, it’ll make his night.

8. He’s Not Really Interested In Anyone Else
You notice that he hasn’t been texting anyone or has mentioned anyone else, and if he does it’s to see how you react. Try to notice how much he actually interest he actually invests in other women. If he’d rather grab chips with you at the end of the night than go home with a randomer at the club, then he definitely like likes you.

9. He Doesn’t Mind Sharing His Food
This is a big one. No lad likes sharing his food, so if he offers you his last chicken ball, he must really like you.

10. He Always Offers To Help You
Whether it’s just carrying your heavy bag or full on washing your dog, if the extent is too big it means he’s probably desperate for your love.

via our content partner CT

6 types of people you don’t want to meet at a party

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Oct 16, 2014

by Amber Saunders

Parties can be a fun place to hang out with friends and have a lot of fun – unless you run into one of this crowd:

1. The Lingerer
You've already told him none of your friends are single but he's still standing behind one of them breathing deeply…

2. The Girl/Guy Who Just Got Dumped
She/He will talk solidly for two hours about the entire relationship before coming to the conclusion that she/he wants to get back with him/her. Exhausting.

3. The Frenemy
You've been acquaintances since childhood but there has always been a competitive vibe between you…

4. The Self-Obsessive
Think Regina George from Mean Girls and this is her best friend. Yes, we mean Gretchen Weiners.

5. The Opinionated One
Nothing wrong with having opinions but not when they're primary goal is to make you feel stupid. As Lady Crawley once said: "Principles are like prayers. Noble, of course but awkward at a party."

6. The Conspiracist
The Illuminati, the Titanic, the water charges, it's like being at a party with Jim Corr…

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11 lies all women tell their boyfriends at some point

Relationships

Oct 16, 2014

by Amber Saunders

While we try to always be as honest and open as we can with the people in our lives, there are still some lies we tend to tell from time to time…

1. "I’ll be ready in a minute"

We're going as fast as we can – promise!

2. "I’m fine"

Probably the most well known lie that women tell. We all know its not true. "Fine" is girls-speak for: "if you don’t figure out what’s wrong by yourself in the next 10 seconds you’re in for it." Whatever you’ve done start making up for it now.

3. "It wasn’t that expensive"

It totally was, but we look amazing in it, so no judgement from you ‘Mr I Only Ever Shop in Penneys’. We deserve it every once in a while. We don’t complain to you about those ugly-ass runners that cost a stupid amount of money. Not to your face. We’d like you to do the same.

4. "I don’t mind"

Oh we mind – but we're trying to be nice.

5. "Him? He’s just an old friend"

Erm apart from the year when you were fourteen – but that hardly counts now, right?

6. "I just don’t want to be in a relationship right now"

You're just not her type but she doesn't want to hurt your feelings, soz.

7. "I woke up like this"

Nope, she got up an hour earlier and snuck on some concealer and mascara – boom. Oh that minty fresh breath? It's just natural.

8. "You don’t have to get me anything for my birthday/Christmas/Anniversary"

Yeah, I know, we’re frustrating. She says it but you’ve got this niggling feeling that that can’t be right and you’re correct. No way will she be pleased if you come up empty handed. If you do and you say: "But you told me you didn’t want anything." You’re supposed to smarter than this.

9. "I’m not jealous"

She’s jealous. Probably while you two are out in a bar and some sweet young thing sidles up next to you and starts getting a bit too friendly. She wants you but you’re taken. Act like it.

10. "It was so annoying, they wouldn’t stop hitting on me"

It wasn’t annoying, she loved it. The only reason she’s even mentioning it is because she wants to get a reaction out of you. Like jealous rage and confessions of undying devotion. It never works because if you don’t act jealous she’ll get annoyed and if you act too jealous then you’re being the insecure annoying one. It’s a lose-lose move, if only we’d stop saying it…

11. "Sure, go on have fun"

It’s not that she doesn’t want you to have fun, she does. But just doesn’t enjoy the idea of you having fun without her. She’s not going to stop you but you’re going to have to tell her how much you wish she could have been there. And you missed her. And she’s great.

via our content partner CT

16 facts you never knew about Friends

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Oct 15, 2014

by Amber Saunders

We all love Friends and people who say they don’t are not to be trusted.

Much of this generation's humour has stemmed from this legendary programme and even the ones we’ve seen before give us a few laughs.

Here’s 16 things you might not have already known about your favourite show.

1. The Geller Siblings
Ross is Monica’s older brother, but in real life, David Schwimmer is 3 years younger than Courteney Cox.

2. Ellen was almost Phoebe
Ellen DeGeneres turned down the role of Phoebe Buffay.

3. ‘The Couch’
The orange couch used in Central Perk was found in the basement of the Warner Bros. studio.

4. ‘The White Dog’
Joey’s statue of a white dog was originally given to Jennifer Aniston as a good luck present from her best friend when she started acting. She offered to lend it to the show for the episode where Joey became rich and bought a lot of stuff. After that episode, the producers decided to keep it.

5. Central Perk
The artwork in Central Perk was changed every three episodes.

6. Monica’s Fridge
The refrigerators in Monica’s and Joey’s apartments actually worked. Monica’s was filled with water and other drinks for the cast and crew. Joey’s was usually virtually empty, unless the inside of the fridge was going to be seen in a specific scene.

7. Paychecks
No Friend ever made more money doing the show than any others. They started out making $22,500 per episode and ended up making $1,000,000 per episode. All negotiations were done in unison. Kudrow said, “The six of us are far stronger than just one person.”

8. The Love Interest
Before the show was cast, the main love interest was intended to be Monica and Joey.

10. Courtney expecting
In the last few months of shooting Friends, Courtney Cox became pregnant, but, seeing as Monica wasn’t supposed to be able to have a baby, they covered up her pregnancy by making her wear baggy clothes while shooting the show so no one could tell.

11. Dollah Bills
When Matt LeBlanc auditioned for the role he only had $11 dollars to his name. When the cast got their paychecks, the first thing that Courtney Cox bought was a car. Matt LeBlanc bought a hot dinner.

12. Free Cameos
Because of a bet between Matthew Perry and Bruce Willis on the set of The Whole Nine Yards (which Perry won), Willis appeared in his two-episode guest role for free.

13. Silly Names
Other titles considered for the show were “Friends Like Us,” “Six of One,” “Across the Hall” and “Insomnia Cafe.”

14. Genius
Matthew Perry’s wit is so legendary that the scriptwriters have often incorporated his gags into the show.

15. It’s pronounced Josh-Oooh-Ah
Joshua – Rachel’s boyfriend in this and a few episodes either side, was in fact Jennifer Aniston’s boyfriend around that time.

16. Real Tears
At the end before the gang leaves to get some coffee, there is a shot of Rachel crying and using Ross’ arm to hide it. These are real tears that happened during filming and weren’t suppose to be in the final shot.

via our content partner CT

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