If you found yourself baffled by the phrase FOMO when it first started getting bandied around, you're not alone.
And if FOGO is much more your jam, you're among friends here.
While the rest of the world counts down the seconds to their first frosty Friday beer, you count down the seconds to your first fleecy fort-fest of the weekend.
And that, ladies, is because staying in is your going out.
1. You have been known to begin undoing your jeans the minute you're through the front door.
Sweet, sweet freedom.
2. You own more pairs of pyjamas and sweatpants than going-out dresses.
In fact, shopping for lounge wear has always been your jam.
3. You get so much joy out of lighting your scented candles at the end of a long week.
To think someone wanted you to stand in a heaving bar after work.
4. You feel no envy whatsoever when Snapcat stories of nights out start flooding in.
Oh my God, the amount of PEOPLE in the background.
5. You wish the money you saved staying in went into a saving account, but instead it goes on takeaways.
It's a sacrifice you're willing to make.
6. You have used every excuse in the book to avoid a night out… and never once felt guilty about it.
People must take you as they find you.
7. Your friends know better than to invite you to anything last minute.
You need at least a week's notice to gird yourself for an actual (sigh) night out.
8. You cringe at the thought of a Saturday night in a city-centre nightclub.
"I'm sorry, but where is the fun in being crushed and having a pint spilled down your back?"
9. The arrival of summer doesn't change anything… despite what your friends might hope.
"My couch doesn't get any less comfortable just because the sun is shining, lads."
10. People who get FOMO have never chilled out on the cushion heaven you have created for yourself.
"The only thing they're missing out on is my fort."
11.Your opening gambit in most messages is 'How was last night?'
We mean, how would you know if you didn't ask from time to time?
12. Having friends visit from out of town is a stress-fest because you know you'll have to entertain… outside.
"This is so unfair. I'll have to actually queue in a f*cking bar for these people."
13. Your hotwater bottle is to you what clutch bags are to other girls.
"Fill her up, and drop her down the front of my pyjama pants."
