All relationships go through a little dip after the hazy excitement of the beginning stages. It’s not as exhilarating as it was at the start, your heart doesn’t race as much and he’s not your first thought each and every morning; this, as we all know, is normal. But how can you tell the difference between a comfortable routine and the impending demise of a relationship? Read on.
Date Night: If you’re more excited by your wine and carbonara than hearing about your boyfriend’s week, then chances are stuff is getting a little stale between you two. (The only time you should really prefer food to his company is when you’re hungover or have your period and if it’s a combo of the two, then all bets are off.)
Cinema trip: You suggest a trip to the flicks, not because you want to spend time with him, but because you really want to see The Babadook and there’s no way you’re going to that terror-fest alone.
Butterflies: They’re not there every day anymore. That’s fine! Ain’t nobody got time for that anyway. But are they there AT ALL anymore? Something to really think about.
The no-pants dance: Do you feel the same emotional connection you felt at the start or is it a paint-by-numbers routine you could literally do in your sleep? Speaking of sleep, if that’s your preference when you’re in bed together then you need to start asking some questions.
Weekly plans: There was a time when you’d step over your own mother (sorry mum) just to spend fifteen minutes with him. Now, he’s just become a less important part of your social rota. ‘Sunday afternoon- oh yeah, boyfriend, I suppose.’
Future plans: Remember when you’d gauge how well the relationship was going by seeing how far in advance the two of you would plan things? Knowing that you were both secure enough to pencil in a trip for three months in the future was oddly reassuring and REALLY exciting. Now future plans only instil a sense of dread in you. ‘The week after next? Ehm yeh…can I get back to you on that?”
A lot of these issues can be easily worked on if you feel the relationship is worth it, but if you're flogging a dead horse then there's no shame in admitting it, initiating the civil and dignified ending your relationship deserves and moving on. Life's too short to miss out on butterflies.