Duffy has bravely opened up about being raped and abducted in a heartbreaking post. The Welsh singer explained that she was ready to share her story and hoped it would offer hope to others who had gone through similar experiences.
The Warwick Avenue singer revealed the harrowing details of her abduction and rape in a blog post last night. She explained that not talking was allowing her rape to become a companion, but she had to wait until she was truly ready to share her story.
The singer admitted that she considered changing her name and moving to a different country to start a new life so she wouldn’t have to trouble anyone with her past.
“I thought the public disclosure of my story would utterly destroy my life, emotionally, while hiding my story was destroying my life so much more.”
The Grammy winner revealed that she was drugged at a restaurant on her birthday, “I was drugged then for four weeks and travelled to a foreign country. I can’t remember getting on the plane and came round in the back of a travelling vehicle. I was put into a hotel room and the perpetrator returned and raped me.
“I remember the pain and trying to stay conscious in the room after it happened. I was stuck with him for another day, he didn’t look at me, I was to walk behind him, I was somewhat conscious and withdrawn. I could have been disposed of by him. I contemplated running away to the neighbouring city or town, as he slept, but had no cash and I was afraid he would call the police on me, for running away, and maybe they would track me down as a missing person.”
“I do not know how I had the strength to endure those days, I did feel the presence of something that helped me stay alive. I flew back with him, I stayed calm and as normal as someone could in a situation like that, and when I got home, I sat, dazed, like a zombie. I knew my life was in immediate danger, he made veiled confessions of wanting to kill me. With what little strength I had, my instinct was to then run, to run and find somewhere to live that he could not find.
“The perpetrator drugged me in my own home in the four weeks, I do not know if he raped me there during that time, I only remember coming round in the car in the foreign country and the escape that would happen by me fleeing in the days following that. I do not know why I was not drugged overseas; it leads me to think I was given a class A drug and he could not travel with it,” she shared.
She explained that she wouldn’t see anyone for weeks and weeks after the ordeal. “In the aftermath I would not see someone, a physical soul, for sometimes weeks and weeks and weeks at a time, remaining alone. I would take off my pyjamas and throw them in the fire and put on another set. My hair would get so knotted from not brushing it, as I grieved, I cut it all off.”
Duffy said she wanted to share her story to help others heal too, “I am no longer ashamed that something deeply hurt me, anymore. I believe that if you speak from the heart within you, the heart within others will answer. As dark as my story is, I do speak from my heart, for my life, and for the life of others, whom have suffered the same.”
“I have no shame in telling you either I had spent almost ten years completely alone and it still burns my heart to write it. I owe it to myself to say it, I feel obliged to explain how challenging recovering truly was and to finally disclose it. I hope it comforts you to feel less ashamed if you feel alone.”
She concluded:”I can now leave this decade behind. Where the past belongs. Hopefully no more “what happened to Duffy questions”, now you know … and I am free.”
You can read Duffy's full story here.