The 11 most irritating things about airports

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May 21, 2014

It may be a means to an end, but airports can be the most annoying places on earth. Here’s our pick of the most irritating things about aiports. The things we have to deal with!

1. The Check in
Queuing up to check in your suitcase you weighed five times before leaving the house only to find some woman is having a row with the steward up above. Furiously shoving her monstrous case into the tiny little measurement thing by Aer Lingus. “I swear ta God it’s five kilos. I’ll make it fit if it’s the last thing I do!” Sigh…

2. The brady bunch
The huge family with the cousins and the grandparents and the twenty hyper children who are no doubt going on their first holiday. They seem to follow you around everywhere, popping up in the cafes, the toilets, and oh, look, they’re getting the same flight. The mother is trying to drag the father from the bar, the kids are either missing or hanging off their auntie or mother (or sister) and the grandparents are munching on a choc ice. Their public domestics are actually quite an effective way to pass the time.

3. Security
It’s time to panic and you although your not into drugs, you can’t help but wonder if you’ve accidentally packed any…

4. Metal Detectors
Now it’s YOUR turn to walk through the metal detector. You’re sure you’ve nothing on you- you’ve checked your one pocket, you don’t wear a belt, you’re braces were removed in third year… So why is the metal detector going off?! You know you’re innocent, but you can’t help feeling like maybe you accidentally put a Samurai sword in your pocket or something.

5. The Stampedes
The announcement CLEARLY states that only families with SMALL children are allowed to start boarding the plane. WHAT’S THE RUSH ABOUT, PEOPLE? It’s not going to take off without you, and no one is going to steal your seat since you’ve paid to have it printed on your ticket! Sheesh..

6. The guy who holds everyone up
So you’ve arrived an hour early, got through security, your bag is checked in and now you’re sitting on the plane with all the other well organised passengers, except there’s one problem. “Could John Smith please make his way to Flight Number XYZ675. Final Call for John Smith…” GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER JOHN!! Seriously!!

7. The cheap skate
The middle aged man stuffing his MASSIVE carry on into the tiny overhead luggage compartment, whilst holding up the queue of people waiting to get on the plane behind. He’s loaded, really, but he wouldn’t DREAM of paying ACTUAL money to check his in bag. He got his flights for half nothing on a deal he won after he spent 100 coupons at Lidl.

8. Small children
You’re on a six hour flight to JFK, so you think you might be able to shift some of that jet lag by getting a little shut eye. You’ve barely even closed your eyes and a high pitched wailing sound like the screech of a kettle fills the plane. Or, if you’re REALLY unlucky, you’ll also have an eight year old martial arts kid violently kicking your chair from behind.

9. Waiting for your bag.
You’ve got your trolley, you’re waiting patiently for your little pink floral bag that has your whole life inside. Ehm, this is starting to get a tad worrying. Where’s my little pink suitcase?!

10. Actually getting your bag
So it turns out you were waiting at the wrong baggage claim.