Terrible relationship advice you really should ignore

It’s been 6 months, get over it. Move on.
I’ll take as much time as I want thank you very much, Mr. Rulemaker

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You should lose weight if you’re hoping to find a new relationship
Screw you, you shallow jerk – I’m all woman!

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You can do better than her/him
Perhaps, but do you know the intricacies of our relationship or are you just commenting without the correct know how

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You should or shouldn’t settle down by the age of X.
I shall settle down when I bloody well choose or not choose to.

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All of your friends are getting married and you’re single and constantly up-skilling, you’re never going to find someone to give me my big day out.
Thanks mum

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Taking someone’s last name is one of the most important parts of getting married.
Oh is it now? How about he takes my name? Would that be OK? Why can’t we both keep our own names. Why do I have to change mine?

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If you don’t make finding a relationship your priority, you’re going to end up alone.
I have all these cats and pigeons that are more than willing to keep me company

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Online dating is for people who can’t find real relationships, don’t use it.
Yes, it’s for fictional people that meet online in a fictional world. Welcome to the 21st century you dinosaur

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A job is not going to hold you while you’re falling asleep at night….
No but my money and all these skills I’ve obtained will

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Everyone needs to have at least one one-night stand..
Everyone needs to do whatever makes them feel happy.

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All men are pigs
Often the answer given to a lot of break ups by friends etc. But for the record, all pigs are pigs – all men are, you guessed it, MEN

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You’ve been together years, you have to get married!
It’s easy to be happy without being married. People in a hurry to get married are just that way because they watched too many Disney princesses when they were younger. 

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