As we all know, people normally fall into one of two camps during the festive season.
There are those that just can’t wait to get started and will spend hours choosing the perfect present for their loved ones and those that leave their purchasing until Christmas week and can’t decide if they like someone enough to fork out thirty euro on a gift set.
Regardless of the camp you fall into, whether you start splurging on the 3rd or the 23rd, Christmas shopping never, ever, EVER goes as smoothly as you might hope and if you’re of a forgetful nature, then Christmas shopping is a living hell.
Here is just one of the ways we fall short every single year.
Expectation: My handy checklist will be my armour against the chaotic Christmas crowds who, unlike me, will have been too disorganised to write a list.
Reality: My handy checklist is at home on the kitchen counter and now I can’t even remember my mum’s name, let alone her favourite perfume.
Expectation: I will be the calm voice of reason in every store because I have my trusty list and I don’t need anything else.
Reality: I will be the manic voice of insanity because I think the woman who lives at home might want that clothes horse.
Expectation: After checking three people off my list, I will relax over a hot chocolate and smugly admire my thoughtful purchases.
Reality: After checking I still have the will to live, I will slug desperately from a can of diet Coke in a crowded shopping centre while clutching a clothes horse like a cray-cray loon.
Expectation: I will remember what I got everyone last year because I will bring last year's list with me too so there will be no embarrassing double purchases.
Reality: I will struggle to remember what I had for dinner last night, so people can just deal with getting the same book three years in a row.
Expectation: I will not overspend because that is not conducive to good financial organisation.
Reality: I will demand that someone take all my money and get me out of this list-less hell of my own making.
Expectation: I will arrive home, put my list aside for next year, tune into Christmas FM and begin wrapping my gifts.
Reality: I will trail home, growl at the forgotten list on the kitchen counter, sorrowfully watch Hostel and try to wrap a clothes horse.
Happy shopping, ladies!