Sometimes it is necessary to be a little bit, well, rude and sarcastic. There are some of life's moment that just require it. End of.
1. Any Time You Happen To Be Around Your Siblings
Siblings provided the perfect platform for you to practice your sarcasm on as you were growing up. You see, your siblings are one of a very select few people that no matter how many times you insult them, will always forgive and forget, making them ideal testing candidates.
2. When Receiving Exam Results
“Oh did you do well?” everyone will inquire, to which you should answer, “oh yeah, amazingly.” Either they’ll believe you and you’ll now be a semi genius in their eyes, or they’ll understand that you’re being totally sarcastic and will back off. You’ll win either way.
3. When Your Parents Are Asking Where Your Life Is Going
The wilder and more vivid your answer the better. Really go to town on it and shock them. Something along the lines of quitting college, joining a circus and moving to Argentina should do it.
4. When People Appear To Have Lost Their Manners
Nothing infuriates us more than holding a door open for someone who breezes on through as though you’re there firstly to serve them. The same goes for rude customers. You’re actually SO WELCOME.
5. To Undercut Your Sworn Enemy
It can be hard to think of good comeback on the spot, so if one comes to you at the time, by all means indulge.
6. When Someone Asks You An Awkward Personal Question
Generally relating to the state of your love life and nine times out of ten, asked by an older family member. There’s no way out of this trap other than to blast them with sarcasm from every which angle and then charge. Because they’re old (no offence) they won’t really understand. Whatever keeps them happy.
7. At Any Period Before 9am
Oh good morning. Great morning, in fact. Could all of the shiny, happy morning people out there just take a running jump and then feck off because mornings are not good for anyone and if you try and talk to me we will have no choice but to be very sarcastic to you. Apologies in advance.
8. At Airport Security
It's the actual worst.
via our content partner CT